


Angels Could Be Bad

by brokopenko



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates, Anal Sex, Angst with a Happy Ending, Armitage Hux Has Issues, Armitage Hux is a Jerk, Blow Jobs, Explicit Language, Hand Jobs, Hate Sex, Hate to Love, Hurt/Comfort, Hux is So Done, Implied/Referenced Domestic Violence, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Kylo Ren Has Issues, Love/Hate, M/M, Past Domestic Violence, Roommates, Smoking, emotionally unavailable assholes fall in love, finn and poe are pure, there'll be loads of sex i'm so sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-11
Updated: 2018-06-27
Packaged: 2018-10-02 12:17:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 10
Words: 36,614
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10217819
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brokopenko/pseuds/brokopenko
Summary: Hux and Kylo get assigned to each other as roommates for their first year of university. They naturally hate each other and argue all the time, with Hux being a neat freak and a perfectionist working on his history and economics major and with Kylo being a messy, angsty art major who plays his pretentious music way too loudly.Fighting happens, shoving happens and angry sex happens. The rest is history. (NOT FINISHED - fic abandoned halfway through)





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'll be switching POVs throughout the chapters but hopefully it'll be clear who's POV I am using. Please don’t think I hate Finn or Leia or anyone, I love all of these characters so much but Kylo is a shit so I have to be mean to them through his angry vision.

Kylo’s day started as horribly as it usually does, with an alarm clock going off way too early in the morning. He hated the sound of that alarm clock even more than he hated his roommate, the person who set the said alarm every day. Kylo rolled over and mumbled at the other bed, “Turn it off for fuck’s sake!”

“Hmmm,” sounded from under the covers on the opposite bed.

“Hux, I swear to god if you won’t hit the snooze button I’ll hit your dick,” Kylo said more aggressively.

“Jesus fucking Christ Ren, chill!” His roommate’s ginger hair stuck out of the covers and his pale hand, covered in freckles reached over to his desk to turn off the beeping phone. Hux rubbed his eyes and stared blankly at the wall before getting out of his bed to go about his usual morning routine at 6.30 am. Luckily, he was pretty silent, except for occasional shuffling here and there, and so Kylo could contently sleep for another two hours from then on.

When he woke up Hux was already gone, as always, so Kylo could proceed with his slow morning routine without any fuss or bossing around, which happened each Wednesday when the start of their morning classes overlapped. Wednesday mornings were hell. Unless he hurried, he’d end up going to the cafeteria for breakfast at the same time as Hux which was incredibly awkward, so he avoided it at all costs. He either dressed at the speed of lighting while Hux was blow-drying his perfect fucking hair in the bathroom or whatever the fuck he did there each morning, and went to breakfast with his step-sister, her annoying best friend and his even more annoying boyfriend, or he just did everything at normal speed and ate a Pop-Tart for breakfast.

Kylo turned up the music on his bluetooth speakers and slowly dragged himself towards his closet to pick out some clothes. Not that there was much deciding to do since his outfit was pretty much the same every day. Black skinny jeans, sometimes with ripped knees sometimes without, a band t-shirt and a black hoodie or a black or dark grey sweater. Kylo never showered in the mornings. He considered it to be inhuman to deal with cold and water so early. However Hux _always_ showered in the mornings, lecturing Kylo on the benefits of starting a day with a brisk shower. All of that was a steaming pile of bullcrap if you ask Kylo.

After he got dressed he went on to brush his teeth in the communal bathroom. He swiftly brushed his long wavy black hair and after two minutes of trying to make it listen to him, Kylo gave up and just tied it in a bun at the top of his head. He hurried back to his room, packed everything necessary for lectures and rushed to the cafeteria, after locking the dorm room. His stepsister, Rey, was already sitting at their usual spot, eating something that looked somewhat appetizing, yet healthy and drinking green tea. The first apparent thing was the lack of Rey’s annoying best friend, Finn, by her side. However, no such luck with Finn’s boyfriend Poe, who was sitting next to her and telling her something undoubtedly very “exciting”. If he had any friends or knew anyone in their dorm section who wasn’t an idiot he’d never hang out with them, but everyone seemed to be even dumber so he was stuck with his stepsister and her merry squad. He slid on the chair next to Rey without a word and glared at his plate of cereal and cup of black coffee.

“What did the cereal do to you, Ben?” Rey laughed at him when Poe was finally done rambling about whatever the hell he was talking about.

Kylo growled and swirled the spoon around his bowl. “Don’t call me that,” he mumbled and yawned, “Fucking piece of shit Hux had to wake me up at 6 am again with his stupid alarm clock.”

Poe chuckled and stretched his arms above his head. “Now, doesn’t he do that every day?” the olive-skinned man asked.

“I swear to God, Dameron. I’ll use this spoon to—,”

“Ben!” Rey scolded him, “Don’t be a dick.”

“It’s morning. I’m allowed to be a dick,” Kylo complained.

Rey rolled his eyes, continued eating her breakfast and ignored Kylo’s glare in favour of starting another long conversation with Poe. Halfway through the discussion, Kylo abandoned their table and head slowly to his first and only lecture of that day with the large cup of coffee in his hands. He played _Depeche Mode_ way too loudly in his earphones and marched across the campus with the poetry book he was currently reading for class tucked under his arm.

Kylo sat down in the lecture hall with a couple of minutes to spare. He took out his phone to check the time and saw that he had two unopened messages. No-one really texted him except for his mother and Rey, but these ones weren’t from either of them. They were from Hux. Or _ginger fucker_ as he had him listed in his contacts. Of course, he lived up to that name with each message he sent and these were no exception.

_How many fucking times do I have to remind you not to steal my fucking pens?_

_I swear I’ll tattoo it on your giant nose in your sleep if you touch my stuff again._

Kylo, rolled his eyes at the unnecessary fuss Hux was making over a stupid pen. It’s not like Hux had a million other pens that were exactly the same. Jesus.

_I just borrowed it, calm your tits jfc._

He shot Hux a quick reply and put away his phone when he saw more students pile into the room. Most of them were wearing baggy knitted sweaters and 80s fashion pieces. At least half of them had dyed hair and piercings. Pretentious twats. Scoffed Kylo to himself in his head. The room went quiet as the professor entered the room and greeted the class.

***

A couple of times per week Kylo attended a boxing class to unwind. He usually imagined Hux’s face instead of the punching bag or his opponent. It really helped him relieve stress and calm him down. He tried to convince his parents to let him take up boxing or any slightly violent form of martial arts but they refused and just let Kylo’s anger blossom.

Truthfully, Kylo’s temper got a lot better after he left his hometown for college. He reached his peak of anger when puberty started hitting him hard at 13 and then again between 15 and 17. He knew it was wrong of him, he knew it was unjust and childish, yet every little thing could set him off. It’s not as bad as it used to be, in the past, Kylo would throw things, punch walls and break mirrors. People around him usually either freak out or try to soothe and calm him down. Neither of these worked. If anything it irritated him even more. His parents, instead of dealing with his issues, sent him off to a British boarding school in hopes of the strict regime making some changes on his behaviour. Nothing changed. If anything it got worse and by the age of 14 Kylo despised his parents. They meant well, he knew they did but the fact that they adopted Rey when they were both 5 and then sending him away for three years just made him hate them more. Kylo tried to hate her. He really did. He couldn’t help but feel as if she was supposed to be a replacement child for him. Rey was perfect, sweet, kind, smart, funny and social. But after a couple of misadventures with her and Finn, he saw right through her good girl facade. He likes to tell people that she grew on him. Like a fungus. But they both knew he didn’t actually mean it. They eventually bonded over both of them being odd in their own ways and strangely enough, Rey was the only one who knew how to handle Kylo’s violent fits of anger. They were still mean to each other more often than not, but they were there for each other when it was needed.

***

Hot water poured over Kylo’s face and down his neck when he washed the sweat off in the showers after the training. He closed his eyes and let himself enjoy the stream of water relaxing his sore muscles. He wasn’t extremely ripped or anything, but he did have hard toned muscles on his arms and chest and was nowhere near unhealthily skinny. What helped was his height, which usually made him seem more intimidating than most. Unfortunately, Hux wasn’t much shorter than him so this trick didn’t work when Kylo tried to seem opposing when arguing with him.

He eventually, left the shower, carrying his dirty shirt in one hand and already dressed in his sweatpants. He rummaged through his closet to find one of his baggier t-shirts and pulled it over his head after throwing the dirty one on top of his ever-growing pile of laundry he intended to do. Really, he was. Just not today. Since Hux wasn’t going to be back until 8 pm when he finished work that day, (and honestly why does Kylo even remember these things is beyond him) he could play any music he liked at any volume he wanted and no one was there to yell at him. He also could actually spread out his artwork on the floor without Hux yelling at him to “get his shit off the rug on Hux’s part of the room, Ren or he’s going to set it on fire”. Kylo despised Hux and secretly admired his ability to have flawless hair all the time and his time managing skill. It seemed as if there wasn’t a second in a day that Hux wasted.

Midterm break was approaching fast and Kylo could not wait for to have his room all to himself again. Hux always turned off his music when he studied, which was whenever he was in their room, with an angry stare that clearly said: “If you turn it back on, I’ll stab you in your sleep”. Hux would sometimes say that out loud too. Naturally, Kylo always turned the music back on. He couldn’t understand why the hell couldn’t Hux just wear headphones. He also commented on his artwork all the fucking time. Usually, they were followed after a glare at Kylo’s desk and sound something like “Why so angsty, Ren?” Sometimes he’d call him Ben just to spite him too, or just raise that stupidly perfect ginger eyebrow of his and mutter “ _so_ edgy” in a voice overflowing with sarcasm. Kylo would then get angry and take his things to the common room or go find Rey and Finn, proceed to complain to them about Hux for twenty minutes.

Kylo managed to get a lot of work done in the few hours of peaceful loneliness while his room was Hux-free and was so deep in focus that he hasn’t even noticed that he had company. An order-loving, ginger haired company. He only noticed after he felt a kick on his back and he turned around with a surprised “What the _fuck_?” Hux was standing there, with his shirt still perfect and not a hair out of place even after the whole day went by, a satchel thrown over his shoulder and arms crossed. His expression stoic.

“I said, turn the fucking noise your sorry ass calls music off, _Ben_ ,” Hux said loudly trying to speak over the music.

“Fuck off, will you?” Kylo said as he stood up to turn the speakers off, too tired to deal with his pissy roommate.

Hux put his bag next to his desk and took off his sweater. “And get your shit off the fl—”

“‘Floor, for fuck’s sake’” finished Kylo in a mocking voice, “I don’t think I will because I still have shit to do.” When Kylo imitated Hux and interrupted him it infuriated him more than anything. And surely when Kylo glanced at Hux’s side of the room, the shorter man was practically fuming.

“Get your shit off my half of the room or I can’t guarantee you your safety in my company,” Hux spoke coldly and marched out of the room.

“You’re a fucking psychopath,” Kylo yelled after him, rolled his eyes and lifted his hand to untie his hair from the bun they were in since he started working. He sighed and started moving his sketches around. There was no use to try and continue now that his focus has been interrupted so he systematically put them away. He took his notes for his modern poetry class and his writing journal and stormed out of the room in order to find Rey. Firstly, he approached Finn and Poe’s dorm room which was a couple of doors down the hall from him. He stopped before knocking to listen for any noises indicating potential sexual activity going on behind the closed door for a few beats and when he was met with only a hum of indie music, he knocked.

“Come in!” sounded Poe’s voice from inside. Kylo opened the door and unsurprisingly, he was met with the sight of Rey doing her engineering homework on one of the desks and Poe sitting cross-legged on the two twin beds he and Finn joined on one side of the room, and Finn laying down with his head in Poe’s lap.

“You guys should really get one of those white boards for the door to let people know if it’s safe to come in without getting an eyeful of ass from the two of you,” Kylo said for about tenth time that month, pointing at the two men on the bed.

“Benny!” Rey spun around on the chair, “Who do I owe the pleasure of pissing you off so much that you were forced to retrieve into a company as awful as our group of merry men? Wait, don’t tell me. It was Hux,” she teased him.

“He’s a fucking nightmare okay?” Kylo complained while he flopped on the other chair and swept empty chewing gum wrappers and a few papers off the desk next to him before getting to work on his poetry analysis.

When Kylo finally got back to the room at midnight, Hux was still typing away on his laptop. He put away his things and took his laptop to the common room where he planned on watching _Criminal Minds_ until his nocturnal brain started to turn off. Two hours later, he returned to his room and found Hux half-asleep staring at his notes, surrounded by two empty coffee mugs and smelling strongly of cigarettes.

***

Hux woke up with a killer headache and some asshole yelling at him. No, he did not just have a one night stand after partying too hard, that was just his body’s revenge for not sleeping enough and his idiot of a roommate.

“Jesus fucking Christ Ren, Chill!” he yelled back and groggily turned off his beeping alarm clock. He squinted at the display for a few minutes, waiting for his eyes to adjust to the harsh reality that he needed to wake up and face the day. It took all of his willpower to drag himself to the showers and turn on the water. He stood there, letting the steam and water wake his body up while running through his schedule for the day in his head. He had an hour and fifteen minutes before his first lecture began and he had to grab a coffee and something to eat before. The routine shower and jerk off were both equally quick and efficient. By the time Hux left the shower, he felt marginally more awake, yet still murderously tired and in need of caffeine. Back in his dorm room, he quickly got dressed into a nicely fitted dress shirt with a flower design that hugged his lean figure perfectly, skinny black jeans and oxford shoes before blow-drying his hair, not really caring if he woke his roommate up. He actually looked over at his bed a couple of times to see if he got any reaction out of Kylo, but all he could see was his duvet and locks of long black hair. He packed his satchel and threw it across his shoulder, before grabbing his phone off the neatly made bed and stepped out of their room.

On Mondays, Hux usually bypassed the university’s cafeteria, with a cigarette in his hand and went to one of the many on campus commercial coffee shop chains. He got his morning dose of caffeine and a morning sandwich to eat before he took his meds and sat down for a bit to answer emails and make a study plan for today. From that moment on until eight in the afternoon, except the one hour and a half he had for lunch and a bit of revision, Hux would go without a stop. Wake up, shower, go to lectures, eat, internship two or three times a week, revision and homework, sleep. It was all a part of his well-structured routine that he got into since college began. The only thing disrupting it was Kylo fucking Ren when he did literally anything. Like now, when Hux was about to take notes and noticed one of his pens was missing. He _knew_ Kylo took it because no one else ever touched his stuff and he never lost his pens. He took out his phone and sent him a couple of threatening texts and rubbed his eyes after. He’d need another cup of coffee after this.

The only person he met since his first year of university started that Hux actually willingly talked to and sometimes even told things besides politely distant conversation was his internship partner, Phasma. They were the ones who got the positions at the end of a long selection process and it became clear she wasn’t there to mess around soon after they began working together. To be quite honest, sometimes she intimidated him a bit more than their boss. So Hux came strolling down the hallway to their desks and dumped his bag on his chair, it was expected that Phasma would have something to say about his angrier than usual expression.

“What crawled up your ass and died there, Armitage?” She grinned and swivelled around the office chair.

“Don’t call me that.” Hux completely ignored her question.

“Let me guess. Your annoying roommate? Overflowing coursework?”

“Just drop it. I’m just naturally pissed off,” he mumbled as he looked through the papers and reports they were supposed to go through that day.

“So Kylo.” Phasma nodded, “I keep telling you to ask the dean to get you a new room. Or just suck it up until next semester and rent a place after that.”

“I don’t wanna talk about it,” he dismissed her and sat down to do his damn job.

***

Hux walked into his dorm after a long-ass day and was in no mood to listen to Ren’s depressing artsy music but someone up there must really hate him, because when he opened the dorm room door he was greeted by Robert Smith’s whining and Kylo’s back turned to him. His broad muscular shoulders were hunched over large sketch papers and his neck was exposed because he put his ridiculous hair up in a bun. (Who even does that? What the fuck?) He froze for a split moment - Hux was gay as they come, can you really blame him for admiring the view sometimes? - before coming back to his senses and kicking Kylo’s back with the tip of his elegant shoe.

“What the _fuck_?” Kylo jumped slightly and turned around to look at him with a furious look in his eyes.

“I said, turn the fucking noise your sorry ass calls music off, _Ben_ ,” Hux said even though he hadn't said anything before but he didn’t want Kylo to think he was just standing there, even though that is exactly what he’s been doing.

“Fuck off, will you?” Kylo groaned but still stood up to turn off his music.

Hux glared at the mess all over the floor, Kylo’s unmade bed, his dirty laundry everywhere and a mountain of papers and sketchbooks on his desk. He put his bag away, next to his clean desk, rolled his shoulder around a couple of times to get rid of the ache he got from carrying his bag on one shoulder for way too long and took off his sweater. “And get your shit off the fl—”

“‘Floor, for fuck’s sake’” finished Kylo in a higher-pitched voice, the asshole, trying to rile Hux up by imitating him. “I don’t think I will because I still have shit to do,” Kylo answered his own request. Hux had a long day and he still had a fuckton of revision to do and this dickhead he had to deal with was not helping the headache that paid him a visit again, so he just stared at Kylo, very much not impressed.

“Get your shit off my half of the room or I can’t guarantee you your safety in my company,” he repeated and spun around to go to the kitchen where he prepared green tea for himself. When he got back to their room, it was empty of Kylo’s art on the floor or his presence. Hux shrugged and got to work.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The rest of the chapters will probably be only in Kylo’s POV unless a lot of people will want to see some scenes from Hux’s POV as well. Anyhoo, I hope you liked this because honestly, I had a lot of fun writing it :). Comment and leave kudos if you enjoyed it and like this idea because I want to know if anyone would actually be interested to read more of this story :D. Have a good day, my dudes!


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo steals Hux's pen. Accidents happen.

Hux was exhausted. The distant noise of a printer was thrumming in his skull, causing his migraine to worsen. He rubbed his eyes and reached for another file on the desk between him and Phasma. He checked all the numbers and was about to sign his name at the top before typing down the necessary information in the computer document. He reached for his bag to get a pen and stopped abruptly. Something was off. He was once again missing one of his pens. That’s it. Ren will fucking pay for this. It’s not like he didn’t have a million of writing and drawing supplies. He’s an art major for fuck’s sake, so why does he have to steal his pens all the time? 

Hux sighed and continued with his work. He had to stay up until two am last night, working on a five-page essay and the only thing keeping him going right now was the insane amount of caffeine in his system and the fact that it was Friday. Fridays were relatively easy days for him, with work until 2 pm and one lecture afterwards. He was already planning his weekend out in his head, thinking how much university coursework he had to get done. Turns out it was a lot. Hux sighed once again and rolled his shoulders to relieve the tension in his muscles and continued typing on his keyboard. Hux yawned and return to planning his essay internally.

Two am was approaching fast and Hux wanted nothing more than to go to his room and sleep instead of attending his lecture. He ran his shaking hand through his ginger hair. Shaking? Since when? He looked down at his palm to observe the light quiver of his slender pale fingers. His frown deepened. This could either be caused by the approximately four cups of coffee he had consumed that day so far (He lost count, but can you blame him?) or the fact that he had only one cigarette in the morning or because he’s been running on an average of five hours of sleep per night since he started university. Who knows? But if there was one thing that Hux was not it was a quitter so he would have to suck it up, be responsible and attend his lecture. As always. Suck it up, don’t show any weakness, don’t show remorse, do your work, be perfect.

He was considering sneaking out for a smoke break but didn’t want to waste time. He shook his head in an attempt to clear his thoughts. It didn’t work. It never works, so who was he even kidding? When he looked up he noticed that Phasma stopped typing in favour of staring at him. Hux glared at her, thinking she’d leave him alone and go back to work.

“You  _ can  _ go for a smoke, you know?” No such luck, apparently. Hux just continued to glare at her with no vocal answer.

“You’ve been yawning and sighing like a damsel in distress in my face all morning. Don’t look at me like that,” Phasma continued defensively.

“That’s none of your concern. I can yawn all I want,” Hux barked at her.

Phasma snorted at his hostile response. “It is my concern because you’re my bloody friend, you moron. You’re paler than the walls of this damn office and you drank three mugs of coffee since we got here,” she went on, her British accent stronger now, as it tended to get when she was around Hux who slipped into his mother’s natural accent sometimes, “Plus, I swear you were about to punch the desk about a minute ago when you were looking through your bag,” she continued, “ So this is either Ren related or you’re overworking yourself at 19.”

“What did you say?” Hux stared at her with his head tilted to the side very slightly.

“That you’re overworking yourself? Hux, do you have a hearing problem?” she asked in a tone that could indicate that she was both, serious and kidding.

“No, I mean at the beginning. By the way, stop analysing me,” Hux said, crossing his arms over his chest.

“That you’re my friend?” 

“Yeah, that. Am I? Is this how it works? I thought you needed to know at least something about a person to be their friend,” Hux rambled.

“Of course you are. You know about my weird roommates and parents and I know about your weird roommate and parents. Trust me. This is a solid friendship right here.” Phasma grinned and leaned back on the cheap office chair. 

“Okay.” Hux shrugged, keeping his face void of any emotions, and turned back to his computer screen in order to start working again.

“Okay.” Phasma kept smiling at him with a mischievous glint in her eyes. “We should go out for drinks sometime next week.”

Hux raised his eyebrows but besides that he did not let his shock caused by Phasma’s words show. “Sure, whatever. Just don’t analyse me anymore. It’s creepy.” It’s not that Hux never really had friends as a kid or even later in high school. He had a few. Oh, who was he kidding? Other than one boy he was friends with when they were both seven he only had acquaintances, classmates and a few soccer teammates. Never anyone to share his secrets, random thoughts or inside jokes with. He was okay with that, really, he was. If he didn’t let people get close, no-one could hurt him. Right? But hearing Phasma say so confidently and lightly that he was her friend made him a bit nervous. It was true that talking to her was easy, easier than with most, and that they shared similar views and traits and that she was one of the few, if not the only, person currently alive that he actually enjoyed speaking to. Was this enough to call it a friendship? Was this what it meant to others? Ah, what the hell, so be it.

Hux forgot about his need to smoke and before he remembered again it was two pm already and he was packing his bag, ready to leave, while once again being reminded of his missing pen. He swore to himself he would make Kylo regret taking his stuff this time. And so he engaged in his most relaxing activity on his way to the lecture: Smoking three cigarettes in a row while thinking of various ways to hurt Ren.

He couldn't do anything violent. After all it  _ was  _ just a pen and more importantly, Ren was way more muscular than Hux and could probably take him down with his weird boxer moves if it came down to it. But he wanted it to be something that would rile Ren up enough to make him remember not to steal his things. His precious guitar chord! Kylo would alway fold it neatly, careful not to knot it or bend it. Which was a rare sight since he was never very careful with handling his belongings. Hux wouldn’t cut it or damage it or anything. He would just hide it really well and await Ren’s reaction. Yes. Maybe he’d make Ren promise to leave his stuff alone. That could be fun, Hux thought and smirked to himself. 

Before he knew it he was already standing in front of his lecture hall and had to refocus his mind and think only about education. But forcing himself not to think about Ren always seemed to be a problem for him these days. The lecture was dull and the room was filled with ordinary-looking people his age. By the end, his right leg was bouncing up and down and he was once again in a dire need of another smoke. 

Just as expected, Ren wasn’t in their room when Hux got there, just as it was each Friday. He usually comes back around 5.30 and leaves with his sister around seven to party or do whatever. That gave him a while to collect the guitar chord. Carefully, because he valued things even if they belonged to assholes like Ren, Hux unwinded the chord and placed it between his bed mattress and the wall. He smirked again at the mental image of Kylo completely losing his shit when he finds out. Feeling content, he took out his book and flopped on his bed to read. 

***

His Friday boxing session was almost over and Kylo couldn’t wait to take a shower and go out with Rey. Or rather, leave the dorms with Rey and go to a party with her, drink alone, dance and go back to his room alone. He was sweaty and sticky from the practice so he was very grateful for the communal showers in the boxing centre. Kylo dried his hair as much as he could and headed back to the dorms to have a quick meal and coffee before heading out tonight. He was listening to  _ blink-182  _ and feeling generally pretty okay for once. This week was going well so far, he wasn’t too far behind on his assignments and Hux was acting mostly bearable. The wind was blowing on his damp hair, making Kylo shiver and speed up.

When Kylo entered their dorm room he immediately knew something was off. Hux was smiling. No. Not smiling. He was smirking, like a ginger cat who just pissed on your new bed sheets. It was a barely noticeable smirk. Just a slight tilt of Hux’s mouth, which was usually turned down in irritation or in a straight line, helping create his resting bitchface. To any stranger, this slight change wouldn’t be suspicious, but since Kylo was stuck scrutinising every second of Hux’s behaviour, he knew this meant something very good had happened. And if it was good for Hux it just had to mean bad news for Kylo.

He hesitantly dropped his backpack to the floor, watching Hux sprawled on his bed like a hawk who was seemingly ignoring Kylo. Yep! Definitely bad news. He scanned his half of the room for any ripped posters or missing photos. Nothing. His band posters were as he left them along with some artworks of his and a picture of him with Rey and Finn above his desk, which he claims is there for him to use as a dart board. Everything was seemingly normal. Kylo walked up to his table tentatively, still eyeing Hux with suspicion. He should probably stop that. He’s being stupid. Kylo sighs and rubs his forehead, trying to get his still slightly damp hair from his eyes. That’s when he saw it. His guitar chord is not in its usual place.

“Where the fuck is my guitar chord?” he asked slowly, through gritted teeth, focusing his piercing gaze on Hux.

Hux raised his eyebrows. “I don’t know what you’re on about,” he said flatly and turned another page in his book. 

“You very well know what I mean, you dick. Where did you put it?”

“Up your ass. Leave me alone.”

“Stop fucking around. I know you took it, so tell me where it is or I’ll break your legs,” Kylo threatened with rage, wanting to hit something. More specifically, someone. 

“Are you actually threatening me?” Hux asked in an amused tone, “That’s low.”

“Damn right I am.”

“Careful, Ren,” started Hux and slowly got up from his bed, his movements slow and elegant like those of a cat, “That you don’t overestimate your powers.” He looked down at the book in his hand before throwing it on his mattress. There was only a split moment Hux got to realise what was happening. When he lifted his eyes, intending to look at Kylo, he saw a dark blurred mass hurling at him and before he knew it Ren was shoving him with all force. Now, Hux was in no way weak or unfit. Years of playing soccer did him some favours. And he was also in no way inexperienced in fights, thanks to his inability to stop his snarky remarks and love for jabbing at imbeciles, but Kylo was quicker. Hux stumbled backwards and only barely managed to stay on his feet. Kylo did not expect his ginger roommate to strike him back with a force almost equal to his own. There was a moment of struggling when both of them were trying to out-push each other as if they were actually afraid to punch the other. Kylo grabbed at Hux’s shoulders and shoved him again, resulting in Hux slamming against his closet door and Kylo in front of him. He grabbed his collar in order to shake him once again when Hux kicked his shin and Kylo had to fight a pained cry escaping from his mouth. He growled instead and pushed Hux to the surface behind him harder, hoping to leave bruises there.

“You-,” Kylo started, breathing hard. His gaze slipped down from Hux’s raging blue eyes filled with hate to his mouth, slightly ajar and shiny. That’s when Kylo also noticed how close they were and that his white-knuckled hands were gipping at Hux’s collar strongly enough to leave wrinkles there. What was happening? There was a jolt in the energy between them and suddenly the thick atmosphere wasn’t so hostile. There was something else there too. Kylo’s heart started beating even faster and he could feel his pants tightening. He glanced up and met Hux’s eyes once again. It could be Kylo’s mind playing tricks on him, he hoped it was, but he would swear that he saw his pupils dilate. It was strange, processing this interaction as if it happened in slow motion when in reality it happened in a span of seconds. It was over as soon as it began and time was back to normal. He panicked and gave Hux one last shove before storming out of the room.

Hux blinked a couple of times in a row to ensure he was awake and that Kylo was really gone. He slid along the closet door and sat on the floor, looking straight ahead.

“What the fuck was that?” he whispered to himself. He decided to ignore his semi-hard on and what exactly it meant and rubbed his face before whispering, “Fuck me.”

***

Kylo sprinted towards the bathroom, shoving aside a couple of confused students, yelling profanities at him. He pushed open the door and headed straight for the sinks, splashing his face with cold water as soon as his shaking hands got the faucet to run. He was still breathing hard and his hair was falling all around his pale face.

“No. No, no, no.” He shook his head and slammed his hands against the sides of the sink. There was no way he felt  _ anything  _ but pure anger and hatred for his roommate. He didn’t even know if Hux was gay for fuck’s sake. Sure, he could admit that Hux was objectively attractive, with his stupidly perfect clothes, hair and a lean figure. Anybody could see that, but his personality was so awful and repulsing he could never be attracted to him in any shape and form. ‘So that thing in your pants is just the embodiment of your disgust?’ sounded a voice in his head, suspiciously similar to Rey’s. He scowled at his reflection and splashed his face with cold water again before pulling his hair up in a knot. 

He was walking down the hallway, heading to Rey’s room, when he took out his phone to check the time. Crap. It was still too early to go out. It’s not like he had any other choice than finding Rey. There was no way he’d go back to his room anytime soon, if ever. Even the thought of seeing Hux again was horrible enough. He could hear Rey’s voice behind her closed door so he knocked before entering.

“Come in, Ben,” sounded her voice behind the wall.

“How did you know it was me?” he asked as he turned around to close the door behind himself.

“I don’t know,” she shrugged.

“You’re fucking weird,” he mumbled.

“Be nice to your sister, Ben,” sounded a very familiar voice from Rey’s laptop. To be specific it was his father’s scolding tone. Brilliant. Kylo came here to escape Hux only to run in on Rey skype calling their parents. Just about the last people he’d like to see. They heard his voice now so there was no use pretending he wasn’t actually there so with a heavy sigh he sat next to his step-sister on her bed.

“Hi,” he said, trying to sound as unwelcoming as possible not even looking at both of his parents on the screen. 

“How are you doing?” his mother concerned.

“Are you doing all of your work? Do you attend all your classes?” His dad immediately followed.

“I’m fine. Everything’s great,” he replied, still sulking.

“Come on Ben, stop lying,” his mother insisted in that all knowing voice she used whenever she talked to her children about something important. “Is this about that roommate of yours?” The distorted image of her on the laptop screen narrowed her eyes.

Kylo rolled his eyes instead of answering. He was sure as fuck not talking about Hux to his parents. Especially not after what just happened.

“Actually, I came to talk to Rey—,” Kylo started but was interrupted by Leia’s persistent voice.

“You’re both coming home on half term, right? And you’re bringing Finn?” Even though they were questions, it was clear that they were orders not to be disobeyed unless you wanted to be the target of Leia Organa’s wrath. 

“Yes Mom,” Rey and Kylo answered in unison and looked at each other with a knowing smirk.

“We really do have to go now.” Rey smiled apologetically. 

“Okay then. Enjoy your weekends and study hard,” Leia smiled.

“And don’t do anything I wouldn’t do,” warned them their dad. 

“So like studying?” Kylo asked in a sarcastic tone.

“Okay, then don’t do anything I  _ would _ do. Behave.” Han shook his head, unimpressed with his son’s smart-ass remarks even though that was a trait Kylo got from him.

“And be nice to each other,” their mom warned.

“As always,” Rey laughed, “Bye.” She leaned forward to shut the call down just as Kylo muttered, “Bye,” under his breath.

The room fell silent. Kylo looked straight ahead of himself ignoring Rey’s suspecting gaze. Her roommate wasn’t in their room and the afternoon sun was shining on the covers of her unmade bed. Kylo sighed and ran his hand around his head to check for any strands coming loose from his bun.

“So,” Rey started and Kylo immediately rolled his eyes, “What did you want to talk about dearest brother?” She was smirking at him obviously enjoying taunting him.

“Fuck off,” he shoved her shoulder not very gently. She shoved him back harder because even though she didn’t do boxing like him, she was very skilled at other types of martial arts and could probably take him down in a fight with not a lot of effort.

“Oh come on, I know you. Spit out the gossip,” she said as she poked him in the side.

Kylo was silent for a while, frowning, but Rey knew he was going to start talking this time so she just patiently waited. When the quiet wasn’t ending, Rey got up from her bed and moved to her wardrobe to change from her sweatpants and an oversized shirt to denim dungarees and a mustard coloured t-shirt. Kylo kept staring at the opposite bed, thinking. He couldn’t tell her what just happened.

“Do you think Hux is gay?” he blurted out, eyes not leaving the bed. Who knew unmade bed could be this interesting?

“Why? Are you interested?” Rey asked, smiling mischievously while brushing her hair next to her desk.

“God  _ no _ ,” Kylo made a disgusted face, his eyes finally tearing away from the covers and faced his step-sister.

“Then why do you want to know?” She was milking it for all its worth. Kylo wasn’t going to tell her anything ever again.

“Forgot I asked.”

“Jeez, no need to be offended. Of course, he’s gay, Ben. Do you even have eyes?” she laughed.

“How can you be so sure?” Kylo crossed his arms.

“ _ Because  _ duh? Have you seen him? How he dresses and just exists. Plus the only decoration he has in your room is that string of small rainbow flags. That’s pretty gay to me. Also, I’ve heard he punched Derek from floor one when he called him a fag and said ‘Yeah a fag who can punch, so stay away from me.’,” Rey imitated Hux’s slight British accent.

“Oh,” Kylo whispered. When you looked at it that way it  _ was  _ pretty obvious. He always thought Hux was just some posh kid and that’s was it. Well if that story Rey mentioned was true then he had some thinking to do. 

“Stop being moody and go get Finn and Poe,” Rey ordered him, “And grab your stuff from your room on the way.”

“Why?” he questioned.

“Because we’re all going to get dinner together before we go out tonight,” she rolled her eyes.

“I don’t want to —,” Kylo was about to complain that he refused to sit down for dinner with them because making conversation with Poe and Finn was pure torture, but Rey stopped him before he could do so. 

“Shut the fuck up and go. Meet me in front of the main entrance in ten minutes.”

Kylo groaned in annoyance, slid off her bed and left. His heart started beating faster as he approached his room. What if Hux is going to be there? What if he says something? What if he noticed something? What if? What if? He was mere feet away from their door and he could feel the blood pumping in his ears. Kylo slowly reached for the handle and felt the biggest flood of relief when he found the door locked.

He mentally congratulated himself for putting his keys in his jeans pocket after he entered the room that afternoon. No sign of Hux in their room. His half of their shared space was neat as always. Kylo’s glance travelled up to look at the rainbow flags above Hux’s bed and mentally slapped himself for never realising they were even there. He was too busy being irritated by their owner to notice perhaps. When he turned around to look for his wallet and phone he saw something on his bed that wasn't there before. His guitar chord. Perfectly folded. There was something in the middle of it though. A blue post-it note with the neatest handwriting Kylo’s ever seen. It just said, “stop taking my shit without permission”.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late update. I have high school graduation exams next month and when I'm done with those I'm gonna try and update more regularly and finish the whole work during the summer. Wish me luck until then and be patient. The next chapter will be up hopefully in two weeks. Also huge thanks to my beta aka my friend Dari.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait everyone. The good news is I passed my finals with good grades and I'm going to uni to study literature and creative writing :) Another good news is that my holidays officially started which hopefully means frequent updates.

The week after the Accident, with capital A because it was a major disaster (Kylo was  _ not  _ over exaggerating in any way). Things between himself and Hux were extremely uncomfortable, to say the least. Both of them were very obviously and purposefully trying to avoid the other even more than before and every time they were in their room at the same time it resulted in a heavy uncomfortable silence. And so that is why Kylo spent even more time around Rey, Poe and Finn. Much more time than it was necessary or than he’d  _ like  _ to, but he’d suffer their annoying chit-chat any day over that overbearing tension between himself and Hux whenever they were in the same room. He was sure Hux had to feel it too because otherwise he’d at least insult and taunt him, and not ignore his existence completely, avoid him and at the same time scrutinise him whenever he thought Kylo wasn’t looking. It made him squirm and he could feel the urge to yell at him raise each time. But he also didn’t want to confront Hux in fear of him bringing up something embarrassing. He couldn’t help but be anxious about it, especially since the place that was supposed to be his living space made him incredibly tense. The only reason he didn’t break the silence yet, the reason that kept him going was the fact that there were only three days and a week left before half term break, which meant the sweet release of his own bedroom at home. Even though he had to spend time with his parents, and possibly his uncle, he told himself he could survive all of that if it meant he got away from Hux. It also meant more space for painting. Kylo couldn’t wait to be able to play his music out loud for as long as he wanted to, without Hux glaring at him or insulting his music taste. Come to think of it, he hasn’t heard any insults since the Accident.

Kylo smiled to himself at the thought of privacy he’d have at home, as he continued typing his art analysis essay, sprawled on Rey’s bed. Finn was scribbling something on the desk and humming a Beyonce song under his breath while Rey sat cross-legged on the carpet, trying to construct something for her robotics class.

“Man, this essay is  _ killing _ me,” Finn whined as he stretched his hands above his head. Kylo barely bothered looking up at him from his laptop and just grunted in acknowledgement. Rey was too deep in thought, toying with tiny screws to answer.

“What do you say if we go out and get dinner or order food in half an hour because I’m going nuts,” Finn complained some more.

“How about you go pester you boyfriend? I have shit to do.” Kylo kept staring at his screen.

“Fuck you, Ben,”

“Suck a dick, Finn.”

“Already did. It’s good for stress relief, bro. You should give it a try.”

“I’m trying but I’ve been told my personality is too off putting.” 

“Touche.”

Kylo lifted his middle finger instead of replying.

“Play nice, boys,” Rey scolded them in a monotone voice, not looking up.

“This is the pinnacle of friendship and expressing love between us. I’ll have you know,” Finn said defensively and proceeded to scratch out several lines on his paper. 

Kylo finished typing the paragraph he’s been working on and rubbed his eyes, trying to make his brain function for a while longer. It wasn’t working. He’s been writing for the past three hours and he still had two hundred words to go. It wasn’t happening.

“Okay, you won. Let’s go out for dinner. I’ll finish this shit after,” Kylo said and unsuccessfully tried to suppress a yawn.

“Yay!” Finn happily picked up his papers and started to get up from the chair. “Rey, come on. I’m gonna find Poe and you two get ready.”

Rey jerked her head up to face him. Her mouth was slightly ajar and eyebrows knit tightly together. “Huh?”

“Earth to Rey.” Finn waved his hand in front of her face, “Me and your brother are ganging up on you. Time for food.”

“Not fair. I’m not done with this yet.” she pouted. 

“Well, neither are we but guess what? We can finish work after,” Finn argued and nudged Rey’s side with his foot lightly.

Kylo frowned at their exchange, forcing himself not to roll his eyes. Before Rey could start arguing, he abruptly got up from the bed and closed his laptop. “Downstairs in five. Get your boyfriend. And please let’s not do pizza again,” Kylo ordered and left the room to grab his wallet and a sweater. Rey and Finn just rolled their eyes at each other as soon as the door closed, because  _ really Ben _ ? 

He rushed down the hall receiving a weird look from a girl who was sitting on the floor of the hallway and reading. When the door to his room appeared in his view he stopped. Fuck. What if Hux was inside? That would be awkward. He rolled his eyes at his own stupidity but couldn’t help repeating “please let the room be empty” in his head as he reached for the door handle. He hesitantly tried twisting the doorknob to see if it was unlocked and when he felt that he could, in fact, open it he started cursing in his head. And sure enough when he opened the door there was his  _ wonderful  _ roommate sitting at his desk deeply focused on the work ahead of himself. He didn’t even bat an eye as Kylo entered and went to search for his wallet. He tried to ignore the fact that the man he hated with every fibre of his being for being so fucking pristine and perfect and bitchy, the man who gave him a boner last week, was sitting mere feet away. Of course, he failed spectacularly. He couldn’t  _ not  _ notice the overwhelming presence Hux had. It was as if his brain couldn't function around him properly, it was as if he was sitting in its corner and giving him that glare with his ginger eyebrows raised up. Doubting him, judging him, scanning him to his very bones. He needed to focus. Find the wallet. Leave. The sound of typing coming from the other side of the room was suddenly louder than anything else and started mixing with Kylo’s quick heartbeat thrumming in his ears. Too loud for him to not pay attention to it even though all he wanted was to forget that he wasn’t alone in the room. He shook his head and started once again going through his bag. By the time he found his wallet he noticed that the typing sounds have stopped. Weird. He shrugged to himself and left the room without a word, suddenly very grateful that Finn suggested going out for dinner because that would give him space to clear his head. Space he very much needed right now.

***

What happened between him and Ren the other week made Hux so frustrated and even more likely to snap at people than usual, and that's saying something. They avoided each other like the plague. Even before they did everything to not be in one another’s company a lot but at least they yelled at each other and sometimes said more than two sentences. Basically, Hux didn’t feel like he was under a microscope whenever he was in Ren’s proximity before as he did now. He knew they both looked at each other when the other one wasn’t looking. He wasn’t stupid. Hux also knew exactly what happened last week. He blamed it on the fact that he hasn't gotten laid in a while because the school was taking up all of his time and a man has his needs,  _ okay _ ? So naturally, if you get squished between a tall muscular guy and a wall you’re going to feel something. What confused him more though, was the fact that Kylo seemed to enjoy it a fair bit as well. Don’t get him wrong, Hux had  _ theories _ but they were that. Just theories. Because come on, no one who does art and poetry major can be 100% straight. But Kylo Ren with his tall frame, broad shoulders, boxing and angry drama queen attitude towards everything seemed very unlikely to be aware of the fact that he wasn’t straight. On the other hand, who was Hux to judge? What was more important was the fact that he felt like a stranger in his own room and the silence was killing him. He’d take jabbing, yelling and hostility over this intense silence any day. This whole situation was draining him and even though he was supposed to be writing a report, he just kept staring at the wall and thinking about Kylo’s intense stare and the firm grip he had on his collar and  _ NO.  _ He needed to stop this train of thought right now. There was no fucking way in hell he would think anything else about Kylo motherfucking Ren than that he was an annoying pretentious prick whose music didn’t let him do his homework in peace. That music in question which he surprisingly heard so little of this entire week. Come on, Hux. Get a grip, he thought. He sighed and blinked a few times before forcing himself to focus once more.

He got most of his assignments done by the time the sky started turning dark and he was quite pleased with himself because that meant he would have more free time during half term break. Which meant more time for taking pictures and keeping his Instagram alive. Hux wasn’t very keen on social media in general. To him, they were a waste of time. He didn’t care what the people he met had for lunch or who they hung out with. It was meaningless to him. However, he did like Instagram a fair bit because he enjoyed photography and enjoyed the fact that his photographs were appreciated.

Hux’s daydreaming was interrupted by shuffling outside of the dorm room door.  _ Perfect. _ Just what he needed. Ren barging in like a storm, being all intense and shit, making him jumpy. And sure enough, the door opened and Kylo entered. Hux quickly focused back on his laptop screen and continued typing his conclusion, purposefully avoiding looking at Ren even though he could feel that uncomfortable tingling sensation he got anytime they were both in the room at the same time. He sneaked a quick glance at Kylo who had his back turned to him. He was bent over his bag searching through it for something probably, and Hux couldn't help but notice how his muscles moved under the dark ripped fabric (It was undoubtedly some pretentious band shirt with artificially made holes to make it look edgy.) and how his long black locks fell down around his face. Hux quickly turned back towards his desk, his heart beating a tiny bit faster. Only when he heard the satisfying thud of the door closing after Ren, Hux could breathe properly again. What the fuck was that? He needs to get laid.

***

Four days and he would go home. Four days and he would be finally able to sleep alone in his own room. Four days. This was pretty much a mantra for Kylo at this point, because Hux was not only driving him crazy for how silent he was but also with his always perfect clothes and the jeans that he wore that made his ass look way too nice. How come he never noticed that Hux  _ had _ an ass was beyond him, but now that he knew he couldn’t stop thinking about it. And honestly what even was his life at this point? He hoped that being away from him for a while would make him forget all of  _ this _ . Kylo sighed and ran his hand through his hair in frustration. Yes, he secretly hoped to get some action during his first year of university but he sure as fuck didn’t think he’d be feeling anything but irritation for his roommate. Hux was way too horrible of a person and way too serious. He could never ever let himself do anything with him, even though he could appreciate the fact that he was hot. It wasn’t as if he actually knew him but he assumed that Hux was a terrible person since he didn’t appear to have many friends, all he did was study and command. If it was anyone else, Kylo wouldn’t care. He’d have a one night stand with them and then never see the person again but if anything more at all happened between the two of them, it would undoubtedly end up in disaster. Plus, he’d have to live with him for the rest of the year which was horrible enough, thank you very much. Kylo almost banged his head against his desk, thinking about it. He wanted nothing more than to blast _ A Day To Remember _ while he drew to get Hux out of his system. The reason why he didn’t play music out loud for what seemed like ages was that he wanted to avoid the conflict it might cause between himself and Hux. Fuck that. If he had anything to say to Kylo if he played his music while he was alone, he might as well say it. Kylo frowned and angrily turned on his speakers. Because fuck Hux and fuck this whole situation. After the loud music flooded the room and Kylo took out his sketchpad to start his half term work sketches, he finally felt himself breathing easier. His muscles relaxed a bit and he stopped gripping his pencil so angrily. Kylo could actually focus on the work in front of him for the first time in what felt like ages. He stretched his arms and got to sketching. 

Kylo didn’t realise how much time has passed since he started working but it must have been at least an hour or two because his music has now switched to  _ The Smiths _ by itself and although he liked listening to Morrissey sing about heartbreak and the pain of his middle-class childhood when the time was right, he preferred something more work friendly now and so he manually changed it to  _ Darlia _ . He hummed to himself subconsciously and tapped his foot to the rhythm. “All in all I was afraid of blood sweat and tears,” he sang under his breath as he continued to sketch.

And of course, when the song was at its loudest, that’s when Hux decided to show up. He stepped into the room, his expensive-looking sunglasses probably hiding very obvious dark under eye circles, a paper cup full of what was undoubtedly coffee in his hand and not a hair out of place. He looked tired and ready to go to sleep immediately but since Kylo knew his habits at this point he knew Hux was going to stay up until 1 am, working. He also mentally counted to three until Hux would certainly tell him to turn off the music. Unless this cold war they were having was serious enough that he’d rather listen to grunge guitar solos than to speak to Kylo.

_ One. _

_ Two. _

_ Three. _

“Turn that shit off Ren, or I’ll cut up your posters and shove them up your ass while you’re sleeping,” Hux threatened him in a chilly tone.  _ HA _ . Kylo almost screamed. He broke the silence first. That surely meant Kylo was the unspoken winner. After he, without a word, turned off the music, he felt like something huge was lifted off his chest. The tension and build up were suddenly a lot lighter. Surely, Hux must have felt it too. That doesn’t mean that it was gone. God forbid. He still felt like there was an energy worth of three lightning bolts between them but at least the weird silence was broken.

“Fuck you,” he replied, only half-heartedly and put on his headphones before retrieving his pencil. Yes. They were back to almost normal. Not that was between them before  _ was  _ normal.

What Kylo couldn’t see was Hux standing by his desk, turned towards Kylo’s back, frowning.

***

Twenty minutes. They were supposed to be leaving their dorms for the airport in twenty fucking minutes and Kylo couldn’t find his wallet. The world was surely against him. It had to be or else there wouldn’t be a pissed of ginger guy glaring at him from the other side of the room instead of minding his own fucking business. 

Kylo searched through his backpack for what felt like a thousandth time and still came up empty. “Fuck,” he whispered. 

“Maybe if you kept your stuff in order this wouldn’t have happened,” came a condescending snarl from behind him.

“Maybe if you kept your mind shut and minded your own business I wouldn’t have the urge to punch you in the teeth right now,” Kylo snarled back, not looking at Hux, whose arms were probably crossed on his chest and whose left hip was probably a bit tilted to the side. Not that he noticed him do those things. Of course not. He was too busy lifting his leather jacket up and rummaging through its pockets. 

“Really? Your fucking wallet? Out of all things?” Hux continued his half-mocking half-lecturing, “It couldn’t have been your headphones or some shit like that because you’d rather die than lose those. Of course, you had to lose the item that contains all of your important documents  _ and  _ money, you utter imbecile.” He went on. Kylo wanted to punch him really bad. He really did. Even though he was right. Which made him want to punch Hux even more if he was honest. “And trust me. I would  _ love _ to mind my own business if your shuffling and swearing weren’t distracting me from my own packing.”

“You’re not my mother. So shut the fuck up.” Kylo kept on searching and did his best to ignore Hux glaring daggers at his back.

“Whatever,” came as resigned response and sounds which indicated that Hux continued to fold his clothes into his own suitcase.

Kylo checked his phone and sighed while he ran his hands through his long dark hair. He thought of tying them back in a ponytail but that could wait. He was so desperate he started looking underneath stray papers and pencils that covered his desk. Only knowing how pathetic it would make him look stopped Kylo from letting out a frustrated whine after he came up empty yet again.

“His fucking wallet,” Hux whispered barely audibly to himself Kylo lost it. The fact that he was already frustrated and that he’d have to talk to his parents in a few hours didn’t help either.

“Listen here, you fuck,” he growled as he abruptly turned to face Hux, “Just because I don’t have a stick up my ass like you doesn’t mean I asked for your opinion,” Kylo seethed. 

“That doesn’t even make sense,” Hux said and let out a mocking laugh that twisted his features into a predatory grin. And really, he should have expected Kylo would flip over that since he gets upset pathetically easily, but he did not expect him to hurl at him across their room.

Before Kylo could do what he planned on doing, which was punching Hux’s face, Hux shoved him as hard as he managed in the moment of surprise, his cocky grin still stretching his lips slightly. The force of his attack threw Kylo in the direction of his bed and Hux stepped towards him.

“Get the fuck off me,” he snarled at Kylo, but before he managed to shove Kylo one more time he was met with Kylo’s hand that gripped at the front of his t-shirt. Hux almost laughed out loud, because really? Deja Vu much?

“Stop being a condescending prick!” Kylo said through gritted teeth as Hux gripped his upper arm, trying to push him away and closer at the same time. They stumbled back and forth for a second, Hux trying to make Kylo hit his bed and almost succeeding. Kylo raised his arm, meaning to punch Hux in his ribs. He then raised his eyes to meet Hux’s who were filled with the amount of rage to what he was feeling himself. He didn’t actually want to hurt Hux, but he was driving him mental. And how exactly have they ended up in a situation so similar to what happened last time? This time they seemed to be even closer. He could feel the fabric of Hux’s obscenely tight jeans through the holes his own jeans had on his knees. He could feel Hux’s breath coming out in shallow angry puffs on his face and smell the coffee he drank a while ago. He could feel the warmth of Hux’s chest through the soft fabric of the t-shirt Hux had on. A t-shirt, which Kylo noted before, almost obscenely put Hux’s collarbones on display. His own heart was beating faster and faster and as he started to feel the heat of his rage slip away, feel it pushed out by something more intense he panicked. Fuck. This was not happening. Except it was. Here he was again, gripping onto Hux for dear life, trying to fight him, wanting to yell at him, but his own body was betraying him pulling him closer. What a fool Kylo Ren was. 

Hux grunted and their eyes met again. Both of their faces scrunched up in rage, whether directed at one another or at their own selves, no-one knew. Kylo’s hand acted by itself and gripped at Hux’s top hair viciously.  _ There.  _ He thought.  _ Not so perfect now.  _ He forced Hux’s head to tilt back, who let out strangled yell. Not a yell of pain or desperation, more like an angry promise to make Kylo pay. Kylo was immensely enjoying the sight until Hux’s hands left his shoulders and pushed him once more, with more strength. Kylo let go of Hux’s hair, leaving it a ginger mess. He felt his shins connect with the bed behind him. What the fuck was going on? Kylo glared at Hux once more and then something inexplicable happened. They both lunged at the other at the same time, insane power and hunger buzzing between them and suddenly they were making out. It was all teeth and pain and then more teeth. Kylo gripped at Hux’s sides hard and dug his fingernails into them through the thin fabric. Hux’s own hands went up to grab at Kylo’s hair. At first running through them lightly and then clutching the strands viciously. Kylo’s eyebrows were still pinched together in anger as Hux bit his bottom lip hard enough to make Kylo draw in a surprised breath. He wasn’t letting Hux win though. Oh no. He pried Hux’s mouth open, all teeth and tongue. Their tongues met in a slippery mess and teeth clacked against each other. 

Without a warning, Kylo fell on his bed and took Hux down with him. Kylo hit the back of his head against the wall behind and before he could let out a hiss of pain, Hux’s mouth was on his again. He landed sprawled across Kylo’s stomach and chest and pinned down Kylo by his hair to the mattress below them. Kylo dragged his fingernails across Hux’s back, hoping to cause Hux as much discomfort as possible, only stopping the heated making out to take quick breaths. The only sound in the room was rustling of the sheets, teeth colliding and wet sounds of mouths and tongues. 

Then Hux shifted and their denim-covered groins met. Kylo’s breath hitched and he had to bite onto Hux’s lip to stop himself from letting out what would be the most embarrassing moan of sheer pleasure. Hux wasn’t so lucky and he let out a small noise of surprise satisfaction, which send a pleasant vibration into Kylo’s mouth. He daringly rolled his hips against Kylo’s, feeling his painfully hard dick behind his jeans slide along Kylo’s strained trousers. Kylo didn’t expect this and he disconnected their mouths as he let out a very shuddery breath. He glanced up at Hux who was staring down at him with a very mischievous look on his face. _ What a dickhead.  _ Kylo thought and he raised his eyebrows daringly before attacking Hux’s mouth with his own once again. This time his hands slipped down and gripped Hux’s ass tightly, making him let out a strangled moan into his mouth.

“Ben!” sounded Rey’s angry voice from behind their door all of a sudden. If Kylo’s heart wasn’t beating fast until then it was threatening to jump out of his rib cage now. Both of them looked at each other in horror as the sound of knocking approached their ears and jumped away from each other at what felt like the speed of light, staring at each other in pure horror.

Hux tried to repair his ruined hair and Kylo felt something hard digging into his back. He turned around on his bed and removed the covers. Well, at least he found his wallet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Leave kudos and comment if you like the story <3


	4. Chapter 4

More banging sounds on the door filled the room.

“Ben! I swear to god if you’re not ready, I’ll personally shave your head! Now let me in!” Rey yelled from the other side of the door.

Kylo, who was still laying on his bed held his wallet in front of his face and stared blankly at it, his chest still rising up and down at a rapid speed. He glanced at Hux, who was staring at him like he just saw him for the first time in his life, and shook his head.

“Yeah, wait a second for fuck’s sake!” Kylo yelled back at his step-sister and stood up from his bed. He looked down at his crotch, checking if the raging hard on he had was too visible. Thank God he was wearing one of his tighter jeans which didn’t hide his boner completely but did enough to keep it down. He ran his hand through his hair quickly and went to open the door, behind which Rey stood with her hands on her hips, wearing a sand coloured hoodie she always travelled in.

Kylo turned away immediately, not wanting to risk her noticing anything. He was very grateful for the fact that the panic he felt started to push away the arousal and he was notably less hard than he was a minute ago when Hux was laying on top of him. He should probably stop thinking about Hux on top of him. Or how he still felt the ghost of Hux’s lips on his own. He reached out for his leather jacket that was on the floor, next to his suitcase and put it on in a hurry while Rey stayed next to the door, frowning at him.

“Hurry up,” she rolled her eyes, “Finn and Poe are downstairs already and the taxi is gonna be here any minute.”

“Okay,” he snapped back at her and hurriedly zipped up his backpack before putting it on. He glanced across the room at Hux, who was now seemingly folding something into his own suitcase. More specifically, he was holding a pair of jeans while looking at Kylo. Their eyes met for a brief moment and neither of them knew what they were trying to communicate to the other. Kylo shook his head and quickly tied his hair up in a bun, missing a few strands in the front that fell around his face. He then grabbed his suitcase, tilting his chin at Rey. “Ready?” he asked her.

“Was ages ago,” she replied in a dry tone and turned around to leave the room. Kylo could see through the open door that her suitcase was waiting for her in the hallway. She was already putting on her backpack as the door started closing when she yelled, “Hurry up, will you?” 

Kylo sighed and stepped towards the door. Before he could leave he glanced one more time at Hux, who was still piercing him with his intense gaze. His face was void of emotions, except there was something gleaming in those blue eyes of his. He was daring Kylo to say something. He could feel it. Kylo met his eyes, raised his eyebrows and walked out of the dorm room without a word.

Only when they were all piled up in a cab, heading to the airport was when Kylo started to breathe normally again. He leaned his head against the window and let the music from his headphones fill his mind.

***

As soon as the door closed behind Kylo, Hux let out a big sigh of what? Relief? Hardly. He didn’t feel very relieved about the fact that he won’t see Kylo for 5 days at least. Not after what just happened. His brain still hasn’t processed the extent of the events, it looked like because if it has then Hux would surely be freaking out a lot more. It was just kissing. He reminded himself. Nothing more than physical urges all humans possessed. It didn’t mean anything. It couldn’t. Physical urges and sexual tension that was absolutely bound to happen between two barely adult men who were such polar opposites as he and Ren. And if they dealt with their aggression towards each other this way then who was Hux to deny himself simple sexual pleasures of life. Right?

He sighed once more and continued to pack. He still had three hours before he had to leave the campus and head to the airport. Plenty of time to pack, shower and grab a coffee but Hux didn’t like to rush. He busied himself with the list of assignments he needed to get done over the break and what materials he should take with him to make completing them easier but his mind kept wandering off to thoughts of Kylo’s strong hands gripping his sides, his hair, his ass and to the sensation his hungry lips left in his mouth. On second thought, maybe he should shower  _ before _ he packed.

***

After Rey stepped into the arrivals hall of the local airport, Kylo could hear the excited barking of their huge family dog and a murmuring voice that sounded suspiciously like his father. He rolled his eyes. Really, he’d take angry Hux over his parents any day.  _ That’s not true. Well, at least not always. Not completely.  _ Sounded a small voice at the back of his head that sounded suspiciously like Rey. He cursed himself for being too emotional as he followed his sister out.

And sure enough, behind the barrier stood their parents. His mom was waiting for them to make their way over to her with hands crossed over her chest — a gesture Rey often replicated when she was being impatient — and a tight little smile that contrasted with the obvious fondness in her eyes. His dad was right next to her, smirking at Rey already. And finally, their dog Chewie — which Kylo thinks is a bear rather than a dog, that’s how huge he is —  was barking loudly and jumping at Rey excitedly as soon as she was in his line of sight. He never liked Chewie. Or rather, he did like him, when he was a kid and then later in his teenage years, Chewie almost bit his hand off as a sign of dislike apparently and since then Kylo avoided all interactions with him as best as he could.

At the thought of having to endure his father’s joking and stoic moods along with his mother’s curt nods, gentle yet tired eyes and lecturing that he ought to do something good in his life, Kylo wanted to scream and run back to his dormitory. If Hux was there at that moment and could hear Kylo’s thoughts he’d probably call him a bitch-baby which made Kylo roll his eyes. He then approached his parents with a small smile and afterwards let his mother embrace him before his father patted his shoulder awkwardly.

He felt bitter when he saw Finn greet Han and how significantly less awkward was their interaction. He knew they would adopt him in a heartbeat if Finn hasn’t been declining their requests. Kylo felt a pang of anger followed by a suspicion that Finn refused their offers partially for him since he saw how much has Kylo been alienating himself from them and how visibly hurt he was whenever he saw how much of a better son Finn was to both of his parents than Kylo ever could be. He’d never admit it but he was silently grateful to Finn. He didn’t think he’d be able to forgive his parents if they ever did adopt him. He had a hard time getting along with them as it was. And it wasn’t anyone’s fault that he and his parents grew distant. Or rather it was everyone’s fault. Past circumstances combined with his parents’ obvious inability to deal with serious commitment and his own fair share of anger issues and it all added up to a nice pile of shit. They both still loved him and he loved them back in his own very strange way but they didn’t know how to act around each other anymore. They were walking on eggshells.

When they finally pulled into the driveway of their home, Kylo couldn't help but feel calmness envelop him. As soon as the car stopped he hurried inside impatient to bask in the silence and comfort of his bedroom before he would be undoubtedly called downstairs for a family dinner where they’d have to talk about their first college stories. It wasn’t all that new to him, to live in a dorm room and to attend a school far from home since a good part of his teen years was spent far more than an hour on a plane away. He stepped into his room and took a deep breath. It was clean, far cleaner and tidier than he left it for sure, which meant his mom has probably been in there more than once. His posters and artworks were carefully aligned on most of the bedroom’s walls. He wanted to take down most of them because they started to look more childish than cool. That could wait. He took out his phone and wirelessly connected it to the speakers on his desk in order to play some music. He then laid down on his neatly made bed. The bedsheets smelled like flowery laundry detergent and home and he smiled a little. His phone, that was now resting on his stomach, buzzed with a new notification. He frowned and picked it up to find an email from his concept art professor and one Instagram notification saying that someone followed him. He opened the app to look at the profile only to see that it was one of his classmates. He switched to his profile without bothering to follow her back as she didn’t have anything interesting there anyway. His account was mostly photos of his artwork, pictures from gigs and one or two pictures of Rey and Finn when they stole his phone and posted them without his permission. He kept them there out of sentiment.

_ I wonder if Hux has an account here.  _ He thought and immediately scolded himself mentally for it. Firstly because he was  _ not  _ supposed to be thinking about Hux under any circumstances and also because Hux was definitely not a social media type of person. But what if? Then again why should Kylo care? He was just curious. However, it wasn’t like he could just text Hux asking him if he had an Instagram account and if yes what was his username. Well, he  _ could  _ but he didn’t want to let Hux know he ever thought about his existence, which is ironically exactly what he was doing.  _ How many people are called Hux anyway? Like five? What was his first name anyway? There’s no way he’ll be hard to find if he does have an account.  _ Kylo smirked and hesitantly typed “hux” into the search bar. He was wrong. There were more than five people called Hux, however right there among the top three accounts there was someone whose username was @gnrl.hux, whose icon was a photo of the back of a freckled neck with ginger hair lining it and Kylo has spent a good few months glaring at said neck to know who it belonged. He stopped at the username though laughing in his head at the fact that the first half of it probably stood for “general” which was ridiculous on one hand and strangely terrifying on the other. He clicked on the profile and besides the fact that all of the pictures seemed to be high-quality shots that looked admittedly very pretty and professional, Kylo noticed the astonishing number of followers Hux seemed to have. It was well around fifty thousand. He raised his eyebrows and started clicking open random pictures. Most of it was minimalist pictures of notebooks, coffee, buildings or galleries which surprised Kylo because he didn’t think Hux was very artistic. The further into the profile he went the more he had to admit that Hux probably put a lot of time into keeping up with regular updates and the quality of the pictures. He caught himself wanting to follow the profile but hesitated. What if Hux notices? What if he makes fun of Kylo for it when they see each other after the break? What if he’ll  _ text  _ him? He seriously doubted that Hux would ever mention it, knowing how stoic he was towards everyone and pressed the follow button abruptly. _ Real subtle, Kylo.  _

“Dinner’s ready!” Rey yelled at him from the first floor. Kylo rubbed his hand over his face, sighed and sat up slowly. He blinked and tried to push unnecessary ginger boys out of his thoughts. When he got downstairs Rey and their dad were sitting down at the dining table already. Rey was excitedly talking to him about her current engineering project and he was nodding enthusiastically while giving her suggestions what could be improved. Kylo rolled his eyes and sat down next to Rey. Not long after Finn arrived at the dining table, carrying a large pot with what was probably soup with Leia right behind him with a dish in her hands.

Dinner was taking way too long in Kylo’s opinion and he had enough of hearing Finn and Rey talking about college and Chewie’s barking and couldn't wait until it was all done so he could go back to his room and preferably sleep through the entire break. So as soon as he finished his food he stood up and went to put his plate in the dishwasher.

“We’re going to watch  _ Criminal Minds  _ after dinner. Do you wanna join?” asked Leia, hopeful, as he was closing the dishwasher door. He didn’t want to stay downstairs with them any longer than necessary but he also knew they probably picked that show to watch because they wanted him to join them since none of them liked it as much as he did. He was going to refuse and wander back into his room but then he looked up and saw his mom’s intense stare piercing through his skull with calm patience as if she wanted to telepathically let him know how much she missed him the past month and he couldn't bring himself to say no. He shrugged and nodded and went to set up the TV.

***

Luckily the break was successfully coming to an end with only one night at home left and there was no sign of Uncle Luke visiting which made Kylo quite happy since he wasn’t on great terms with him at the moment, unlike Rey who was apparently upset at the prospect of not seeing him while they were at home and was now out for a jog. 

Kylo was sitting at his desk with his sketches covering every inch of the wooden surface and tapping his foot to the rhythm of sad indie music coming out of his big speakers. He was beginning to line the sketches of concept art for one of his classes and the one he was working on displayed a young woman in a forest sword fighting a tall man the middle of a forest. They suspiciously looked like himself and Rey but he shrugged it off — since most of his art generally included people he either knew or saw on the streets — and continued to carefully line the trees. His hair kept falling into his eyes so it was now tucked behind a headband which he was about to adjust when Rey burst into his room, frightening him mildly.

“Me, you and Finn are going to ride around the neighbourhood, while listening to bangers and then watch the sunset near the forest before dinner. No objections,” she blurted out, standing in his doorway with a grin on her face, “So be at the car in an hour or I’ll drag you there by your hair.” She closed the door and Kylo could hear her running downstairs before his mind had the time to even form a coherent reply. He sighed and went back to drawing. 

***

“I hate this old piece of junk,” complained Kylo as he was forced — the use of the word  _ forced  _ is very necessary as Kylo was doing this against his will and he refused to acknowledge the fact that he may have missed going on late rides with Rey and Finn and feeling like he belonged there — into the back of Rey’s old, barely functioning second-hand Mercedes 450 which she saved up for, working two summer jobs during her first summer of high school and then fixed so it would actually ride. It made horrible noises whenever someone started it, there were stains on the seats from the previous owner no-one has been able to remove and Kylo was fearing his own safety whenever he rode in it.

“Stella is  _ not  _ a junk, thank you very much and she has feelings,” Rey objected as she climbed into the driver's seat.

“It’s a fucking junk,” Finn mouthed at Kylo from the front passenger seat and laughed when Rey hit him in his arm upon noticing he was shit-talking her precious car. Kylo just rolled his eyes and settled in the middle of the backseat. He would have put on a seatbelt if there was any and watched as Finn fiddled with compartment handle and pulled out a case with shitty mixtapes on CDs they made years ago, specifically to play in the car because the radio understandably did not have an aux cord and no one in their right mind would invest in a new radio for a car like this. Rey started the engine and mumbled to herself happily as it roared to life. Kylo was 99% sure that cars weren’t meant to make that but who was he to judge. He leaned forward to look above Finn’s shoulder and see which CD he was holding. He was currently holding two CDs in his hands, trying to decide between  _ 80s/90s Hits aka BEST JAMS EVER (finn’s mixtape)  _ and  _ FRK CARPOOLING MIX.  _

“If you play that trash mix of yours I’m getting out,” Kylo said and swatted his hand at the CDs while Rey slowly pulled out of the driveway.

“Fuck off! I’ll have you know Bruce Springsteen doesn’t give a fuck because you’re wrong and the 80s have in fact produced the best music ever known to a man,” Finn retaliated and clutched his CD to his chest.

“Finn, seriously… Even I refuse to listen to listen to Duran Duran and Tears for Fears for two hours,” argued Rey and Finn looked at her with hurt.

“How could you?” He shook his head and reluctantly slipped the other CD into the player and  _ Bad To The Bone  _ filled the car. They all bowed their heads to the rhythm and Kylo and Finn tapped the seats and the car board. Kylo grinned despite himself because rare moments of unity like this was why he tolerated his sister and Finn. You’d never hear him admit it out loud though plus it’s not like anyone needed to know, he told himself as they all sang incredibly off key and rode out of the suburbs while the sun started to set and painted the sky all hues of yellow. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry it took so long idek where all the time went :((


	5. Chapter 5

The room was eerily quiet except for the soft drumming of raindrops on the window. Hux looked at his now unpacked suitcase in the corner and reached to the table to grab his laptop before sitting down on his bed and leaning against the wall. He knew it wouldn’t be long before Kylo would come back which meant he would be agitated and tense and wouldn’t be able to get anything done so he might as well take the chance at enjoying the peace while he could. His break was way more stressful than he anticipated it would be since he had to deal with moving houses and selling the estate his father left him after his death and he barely had time to finish his assignments, let alone to rest and think. What is more, after that one last visit to his childhood home the nightmares crept into his sleep once again and he felt less at peace than since university began. It was foolish of him to think that he would be able to finally let go and live freely once he sold the estate. Well, there was no point in wallowing in self-pity and thinking about his tragic past now when it was all done. Objectively he was now freer than ever with the house gone along with all of his father’s belongings along with most of Hux’s childhood items and the company on his cousin’s shoulders. He wasn’t in that damned house anymore, his documents officially said he lived in a new flat in New York, he was safe, he was alright. He was also sitting in his dorm room which inhabitant number two would be soon in his immediate proximity. To be honest, Hux also hadn’t anticipated how much that little exchange between him and Kylo would gnaw at him. He thought about it way more than he cared to admit and was dreading that awkwardness between them that was there after the first incident. He could also try and talk to Ren about it. Ha ha. No. Hux dared to say neither of them was ready to acknowledge the fact that there even was something to talk about, but even the thought of having to see Ren again drove him crazy. He hoped to God, if there was any, that Ren would for once not sleep in nothing more than a t-shirt and a pair of boxer briefs.

Hux was in the middle of day dreaming about Ren’s legs when the said legs stepped into the room, carrying with them a very angry oversized man-child who was wearing headphones and completely ignored his existence. _Fuck. Here we fucking go._ Hux thought and turned his gaze towards the computer screen trying his hardest not to watch Ren’s every single move. He didn’t even have work to do anymore since all of his assignments were handed in. He opened up the file with his syllabus and thought of reading through the assigned materials for a couple of lectures ahead but with everything going on he couldn’t bring himself to do so and just turned on Netflix. He glared at his list of recently watched shows and movies and hovered with the cursor between _House of Cards_ and _Downton Abbey_ and decided to continue where he left off with the latter. If anyone asked he was doing it for his History paper research. No-one needed to know the fact that it also had a quite attractive evil gay footman and relationship drama, which he enjoyed too.

He was glad for the distraction because whenever he dared to glance away from the screen, Ren was still there. He was laying on the bed opposite of him, staring at his laptop screen as well but Hux would swear he felt his eyes on him whenever he looked away. He looked back at his own screen and the tiniest of smirks tugged on the corner of his mouth. Fine. If this is how they were going to play this game so be it. Hux always wins. Hux is also the more direct one of the two of them so he would confront Ren about what happened before the break and see him squirm. This whole situation was about to get very interesting.

***

Days went by and it seemed as if the tension between them wasn’t moving up or down. It just was always there on the same level. Hux was beginning to be very sick of it. He wasn’t sick of Ren’s intense, piercing glances though, he found those quite entertaining, however, they interfered with his own intense stares, because it was harder to watch Ren and go unnoticed when Ren was looking right at him most of the time they spent in their room. Which wasn’t little since neither of them particularly rushed to get out, which was new, but it made the tense atmosphere seem almost normal.

On one particular afternoon, when Hux was drinking his fifth coffee of the day, sitting comfortably on his bed while editing last bits of his assignments when Ren marched into their room with his art folder in one hand, iced-tea in another and muffled music flowing out of his headphones as usual. He spared Hux a glance, too quick to be seamless and set his things down on his incredibly messy desk. There were pencils and crumpled papers everywhere and Hux cringed internally every time he happened to look at it. Ren was rummaging through his papers, his headphones now resting around his neck, just below where his hair was tied in a bin. Hux fucking hated his hair. _Or hated the fact that his fingers weren’t tangled in them?_ He thought and immediately wanted to smack his own stream of consciousness. Could you really blame him though? Ren was just standing there with his stupid broad shoulders not even looking for anything, probably only turned towards his desk to avoid meeting Hux’s eyes.

Hux sighed and sat up straighter. _I guess it has to be me to do the talking for the first time once again._ He tilted his chin up a tiny bit, while mentally slapping himself for being a wuss and spoke in his confident snarly tone. “Are we ever going to talk about the elephant in the room or…?” he asked and trailed off.

Ren’s head snapped upwards and Hux could practically see the muscles on his back tense as if someone poured a bucket of ice cold water over him. “What?” Ren asked in a low tone. He slowly, obviously forcing himself to look casual, turned around to meet his eyes. For a few beats, their eyes met. Blue and brown. Hux wanted to repeat the question and add some remark about Ren’s lack of intelligence but his voice was stuck in his throat, it seemed like. He felt paralysed by Ren’s stare. He wasn’t frowning at him or anything but Hux felt as if Kylo’s eyes were drilling a hole into his brain. Like he could see right in and read every single thought in his brain and he felt a cold shiver on his spine.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Ren said in a deep voice and before Hux could repeat his question, he was out of the room. Only when he was alone again, Hux seemed to be able to think properly again. _Fucking dickhead. Runs away from problems as always swear to God I’m gonna kill him if this happens again._ He wasn’t exactly sure what _this_ meant but he was fairly sure he was referring to Ren’s inability to communicate like an adult and not those “accidents” which stopped feeling like accidents after the second one even had the chance to end. Hux saved his files and emailed his only once proofread and edited assignments out. He needed to get out of this room before he went insane. Everywhere he looked there was some trash of Ren’s. Hux pocketed his wallet and picked up his phone with earphones and left half of his coffee on the table before leaving the dorm room.

Dark settled over the university campus a good hour ago so Hux was glad for the jumper he grabbed on the way out. His breath was coming out in soft puffs of smoke as Hux hurried to his favourite bar only a couple of blocks away from the edge of the campus. He lit up a cigarette on the way there letting the familiar taste and nicotine help him soothe the trembling in his fingers that only seemed to have gotten worse after the break. Finally, he saw the familiar orange neon display as he walked off the main road and took a few long drags before putting the cig out and tossing it towards the nearest puddle mixed with orange leaves. Halloween was coming. Hux wasn’t big on festivities but he had to say fall with its orange and brown hues, cinnamon and horror flicks was his favourite time of the year.

He entered the bar and his nostrils were immediately filled with the smell of wood, cigarette smoke and nutmeg for some reason. There was hypnotic electro music playing a slow tune over the speakers and the wooden tables were illuminated by big light bulbs hanging on wires from the ceiling in a haphazard fashion. The place could hold about 20 people at best and Hux was glad that tonight there were only two small groups of students one lady sitting at the bar stools. He liked the place for its calm atmosphere and the fact that it was rarely full. He approached the bar, further away from the lady because he noticed she was crying semi-hysterically to someone over the phone and after giving her a side eyed glance, Hux wanted to be as far away from her as possible. The barman — a quite handsome dark skinned man with a stubble who always wore a tank top — turned to Hux with a smile, probably relieved to get a break from listening to the strange crying lady. Whenever Hux was there and was in a good mood he tried hitting on Hux who wasn’t exactly opposed but he didn’t want to sacrifice his source of good wine and Mojitos for a one night stand. He was very tempted tonight though but somehow he knew it wouldn’t feel right so he just politely asked for both Mojito and a glass of the best red wine they had because fuck Kylo fucking Ren. He thanked the barman and sipped on his Mojito while he fiddled with his phone, deep in thought.

Hux couldn’t help but still think about Kylo’s dismissive reaction and how strange he acted. _Maybe he’s dealing with some internalised homophobia… I mean I’d be the first one to know about that._ Hux thought at first, but the longer he thought about that, the less likely it seemed. First of all, he’d surely make comments about Hux’s choice of clothes and wall decor by then. Plus those two guys he and his sister hung out with every time he happened to see them in the canteen, around the campus or out clubbing were definitely together. _Maybe it’s the first time he realised he might be into guys and that’s why he’s freaking out._ Was another thought of his. He had no way of confirming if Ren was out or not though. Or did he? He opened the Instagram app on his phone quickly and stared at the timeline for a while. If it wasn’t his mind playing tricks on him Ren actually fucking followed him on there the first night of the break. And surely in enough, in his recently looked up accounts was @kylo.ren. Fucking of course.

Hux greedily opened up the account and started scanning each photo for any evidence. It’s not like there were many but he still looked through the caption on each one of them before giving up. Either way, Hux was going to have a lot of fun with captioning his own post from now on, since he knew Ren would probably look at them. He could get creative with them and type stuff like “Do your laundry” or “I hate screamo music”. Hux’s music was interrupted when he finally found _the_ picture. He smirked around the straw of his drink. _Bingo._ It was a rare shot of Ren sort of smiling next to his sister who was laughing and the other two of their weird squat behind them, kissing with a rainbow flag wrapped over them and confetti falling all around. What was interesting to Hux, however, was the fact that he had pride flags drawn on his cheek and his sister the bi pride one on hers. The caption read “pride was ok #lgbtq #gayashell”. Hux was almost convinced that’s all the evidence needed. _But what if he just had it as an ally._ He continued to speculate and barely noticed when there was no Mojito left to drink. He moved onto the pictures he was tagged in and simultaneously reached for the wine. There was another picture, obviously taken at the same spot as the one he just saw but this time those two guys were sitting down next to them. It was his sister’s account from what h understood and all of his doubts went away after he read the caption “when no one’s straight in this squad” underneath. Hux was pleased with the evidence, however that dent him back to square one, which meant he had no idea why the fuck was Ren acting like a child about it.

He rubbed his eyes and downed the rest of the wine in a few gulps, sort of regretting not enjoying it more immediately after. Hux left enough money to cover his drink, along with a generous tip on the bar table and immediately after he left the building he lit up another cigarette. There had to be some form of deity that day looking at Hux though because Ren was nowhere in the room and so Hux could freely fall into hopefully dreamless sleep.

***

First exams of the year were looming over everyone’s shoulders. Except for Ren of course, because Art majors of course only handed in work and didn’t actually have to study for midterms. _Fuck those guys._ Thought Hux. _But especially fuck Ren._

He hasn’t been able to sleep without waking up in a puddle of sweat after a nightmare for a week now and the shake in his hands was only gone when he took more frequent smoke breaks than he wanted to and wasn’t sure whether the stress would even go away once exams were over. Hux had spent the last five hours in the university library but after his stomach refused to shut up about wanting food, he reluctantly packed up his things to leave and buy some groceries from which he would try and cook something at least partially decent.

“Turn it off,” Hux said, upon arriving in their room and as always heard some man wail about his sadness from Ren’s speakers, but it lacked the usual bite because he was _not_ dealing with that shit tonight. Ren just plugged in his headphones wordlessly, not even bothering to look at him. He rolled his eyes and set a steaming mug of earl gray on his desk and sat down to continue revising. There was a storm coming outside and Hux could see the dark clouds approach the city through their window as he took out his books and notes and set them next to his tea and got to work.

His earphones were playing a quiet hypnotic techno music and his eyes were frantically skimming the pages in front of him and a few strands of his usually side-parted and neatly combed hair were hanging loosely across his forehead, distracting him. Time was wearing thin and midnight was near which meant Hux should be finishing up this topic but there was a set of dates he just _couldn’t_ remember. He held up his pencil and tapped it lightly against his lips at the same intervals his leg was bouncing in when all of a sudden he felt a hand grip at his shoulder which made him jerk up and remove his earphones at the same time. His heart was beating fast and he felt terrified for a moment before remembering the only person who could ever hurt him was dead. He breathed out. This was just Ren. He turned himself on his chair, and looked up, frowning accusingly at Ren who was still gripping his shoulder and looked more pissed off than usual. For a few seconds they just stayed like that, frowning at each other. These staring matches started to become very repetitive.

“Stop bouncing your leg, I’m doing lineart and it’s shaking the floor,” Ren said and somehow managed to sound like a whiny child.

“I highly doubt me bouncing my leg is so strong that it would make the floor shake. You’re delusional,” Hux announced with a blank stare and watched as Kylo took a deep angered breath. The grip on Hux’s shoulder grew painful and Hux tilted his chin up, arrogantly, daring Ren to do something as he resolutely bounced his leg up and down a few times again. He had a feeling he knew where this was going.

Ren fucking _growled_ and put his other hand on Hux’s knee and pushed his leg down as if saying “There. Try bouncing it now, fucker.” Hux felt the heat of Ren’s palm on his knee and his ridiculously long fingers pointing towards his groin, spreading tingles up his thigh. He kept looking at Hux’s face, studying him and still frowning accusingly even though it was him who was holding Hux down, pinned to a chair and practically spreading him open with his eyes. Hux stared back at him and was about to say something when Ren lunged himself at him and pressed their mouths together so forcefully it hurt. Hux gasped quietly and instinctively bit Ren’s bottom lip in response, prompting him to continue and prying his mouth open before sliding his tongue across Ren’s teeth. Ren’s right hand left his knee and fisted the fabric of Hux’s salmon shirt whose collar has been left unbuttoned and Hux’s hands shot up toward Ren’s hair in an attempt to keep him where he was as he pulls on them which makes Ren let out another growl and attack Hux’s mouth with more vigour. That made Hux grin into the kiss which did not go unnoticed by Ren who muttered “Fucker.” in between biting and licking. As he spoke, Hux felt his hot breath on his wet lips and involuntarily shuddered. He felt arousal rise in his abdomen and panicked slightly about where the situation was going what with nothing stopping them from going too far, but he found himself not really caring if anything else happened, actually quite _hoping_ something would. Ren suddenly let go of Hux’s shoulder and in one seamless move turned his chair away from his desk and straddled Hux’s lap immediately after. Hux’s eyes widened as his he felt the weight of Ren’s body on his thighs. Ren was obviously pleased that he got a reaction out of Hux because despite his frown the corner of his lips twitched.

“Fuck you,” Hux snarled at him and moved his hands to grip at Ren’s sides tightly, hopefully, tight enough to be painful. Ren tilted his head down and dark strands of hair fell down around his face, some of them tickling Hux’s cheeks, that’s how close they were. Ren put one of his hands in Hux’s hair too and gripped the longer strands on top as he did once before and the other hand pinned Hux to the back of his chair. He jerked his hand, sending waves of pain through Hux’s skull and before he has a chance to make a sound of complaint connected their lips once again with an obscenely wet sound. They were both breathing loudly through their noses, the only sound they allowed themselves to make. It was a game for Hux to wait which one of them would be the first one to make a sound. Even if it was one of those throaty hums. He explored Ren’s mouth with his tongue for a while, clanking their teeth together a few times in the process, before Ren suddenly moved away and dipped his head to the crook of his neck where his bit down on Hux’s pulse point. It turned out Hux would be the first one to make a sound, because as Ren’s mouth worked the spot, feeling Hux’s erratic heartbeat on his tongue, he let out an embarrassing gasp and gripped Ren’s sides even harder. He could feel he was getting hard in his pants. _Fuck._ Ren’s mouth moved down, close to where his neck met his shoulder and trailed the path with his teeth which made Hux squeeze his eyes shut before letting out another breath. Ren bit down again and then moved further up, mouthing the spot behind his ear. Hux shuddered again and his hands moved under the fabric of Kylo’s t-shirt and grazed his fingernails across his back which earned him another bite on his neck. Ren rolled his hips slightly on Hux’s lap and then returned to his pulse point and did _something_ with his mouth that made Hux actually fucking moan and if Ren’s crotch pushed against Hux’s stomach was anything to go by, Ren was thoroughly enjoying himself too. Hux moved one of his hands away from Ren’s body in order to take a hold of his hair with it and pull Ren away from his neck. He looked at his angry expression with amusement. “Enjoying yourself?” he teased and looked down between them briefly, addressing the fact that Ren was now not so subtly grinding on Hux’s legs.

“Fuck off,” Ren snarled at him, his angry glance falling down on Hux’ parted lips.

“I can’t. You’re sitting on me,” he stated the obvious before pushing Ren’s face toward his own but bypassed his lips and pushed him even further. He tilted his head and bit down on Ren’s neck before sucking on his pulse, returning the “favour”. Ren has probably left him with a hickey and he was simply making them even. It had nothing to do with the fact that he wanted to hear Ren moan and see him writhe. He nibbled on the same spot before pressing his tongue against it. Hux’s lips left Ren’s neck for a second and he let his breath hit the wet skin which made Ren shiver. Satisfied, he moved down to Ren’s collarbones and continued to bite and lick there. By that point, Ren was making desperate little sounds at the back of his throat and Hux found it endearing that someone so big could make sounds like that. Ren was almost slumped over Hux, pushing his crotch closer to Hux’s stomach. Ren could feel how hard he was since his ass was basically right on top of Hux’s crotch he was sure he knew that Hux did not hate the situation at all. Each time Ren moved his hips he rubbed his ass on Hux’s cock under his clothes and Hux had to bite down on Ren’s neck even harder in order not to let out more embarrassing moans. But then Ren moved his hand toward Hux’s stomach and slipped his fingers under his shirt. His hot long fingers travelled up and Hux hitched his breath and stopped mouthing Ren’s neck for a bit. Ren rolled up his shirt, exposing his pale torso and stopped his hand on Hux’s ribcage. He had him pinned there like a prey and he knew it but Hux was not letting him have control so he once again jerked Ren’s head by his hair and he made him stare into Hux’s eyes as his other hand reached between their bodies and he grabbed Ren’s erection through the denim of his jeans. Ren’s eyes darkened and his lips parted but his eyebrows were still pinched together in a frown as he stared back into Hux’s eyes, unhinged. Hux raised his left eyebrow and unbuttoned Ren’s pants. Ren closed his eyes for a second and took a shaky breath. When he opened them, he moved the hand on Hux’s ribs to the right, feeling his heart beat so fast as if it was about to jump out of his body, and his finger grazed Hux’s nipple.

“Fuck,” Hux whispered breathlessly but refused to take his eyes off Ren. He unzipped his pants and felt Ren’s arousal through the thin fabric of his boxers. Hux palmed it and then gave it a squeeze, only to see Ren’s lips part even more and hear him make a low “ah” sound. Hux looked into his eyes, searching for a go ahead in them with his raised eyebrows. Ren gave him the slightest nod, knowing what Hux was silently asking while breathing hard. Hux couldn’t bring himself to look into Ren’s eyes while he jerked him off. It would be too intense. It would mean there was something there to look at. So he pushed Ren’s head to the side again and returned to the crook of his neck while his hand slipped into his underwear. He gave him a few experimental strokes while he bit down lightly on his neck. Ren’s dick felt hot, heavy and thick in his hand and for a moment Hux wondered what would it feel like to have it inside him. He continued to rub it, slowly quickening his pace, brushing his thumb over the tip a couple of times. Ren let out a moan and jerked his hips up into Hux’s hand. Hux’s mouth was no longer on Ren’s neck but he had his face buried in his shoulder, breathing shallowly, continuing to jerk Ren off who was gripping his sides and whose breath was tickling Hux’s hair. Each time he changed the pace of his hand Ren desperately moved his hips and sent Hux into shocks of pleasure when he ground on his own erection. If Ren kept moving like that he wasn’t sure how long he would last. Hux felt his own build up coming as he stroked Ren faster and faster until he heard him gasp.

“Oh my God.” Ren’s whole body tensed and then he came over Hux’s hand with a moan. Hux continued to stroke him through the aftermath as Ren’s shoulders shook with pleasure and his loud breaths filled Hux’s ears. Ren moved his head and without looking into Hux’s eyes locked their lips as he moved his hips across Hux’s groin. Ren gripped his jaw and worked his tongue inside Hux’s mouth as he continued grinding his hips making Hux moan into his mouth as he came in his pants while digging his hands into Ren’s back.

They breathed onto each other’s mouths with their eyes closed as they both came down from the post-orgasm bliss. But it didn’t take long before Ren got off his lap, grabbed something from his wardrobe and left the room so Hux was left there alone, sitting at his desk with his legs slightly numb from Ren’s weight, his hair messy and cum in his underwear. Typical.

 _What the fuck just happened?_ Hux thought. Did he really just give Ren a handjob? If the cum splattered on his hand was anything to go by then yes he did. He sighed and stood up to collect his towel. Hopefully, he won’t run into Ren in the showers, but there was no point in trying to continue revision like this.

***

Hux entered the dorm room with his hair still wet from the shower and was met with Ren sitting on his bed with his hair up in a bun, a colourful array of hickeys on his neck exposed for him to see. They were so _there_ and Hux couldn’t tear his gaze away. He examined his own neck after taking a shower to see that Ren surprisingly only left one smaller one on him which would probably fade in two or three days luckily. Ren looked up from a comic book he’s been reading and met Hux’s eyes. They both opened up their mouths to speak at the same time but Ren was quicker.

“We’re just helping each other relieve tension. It means nothing, but I won’t do it again if you don’t want me to,” stated Ren bluntly in that deep voice of his that alone could probably do wicked things to Hux if he let it.

“I want you to,” Hux answered the indirect question, surprised that Ren whose piercing stare was starting to make him squirm, was actually talking to him about it.

“Good,” said Ren and got back to reading. Hux looked at him quizzically and took off his trousers swiftly. There was no point in continuing revising now. It was one in the morning and he doubted he could focus on early Romanian empire and its social structure without his mind wandering to Ren’s mouth and stupidly intense stares. He slipped under the covers and checked if the alarm on his phone was on. He resolutely rolled away to face the wall so that he didn’t have to accidentally look at Ren and let the distant shuffling from the other side of the room lull him to sleep.

His dreams started quite pleasantly with Ren kissing him and surprisingly gently palming the sides of his neck but soon turned back into his usual nightmares and Hux shifted uncomfortably in his bed, wishing to wake up, until the morning came around and the beeping of his alarm welcomed him back to reality.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is actually the first ever sex scene that I ever wrote so I hope it's not too terrible haha. Please leave your thought in the comments :). Things are picking up pace from here on very quickly so get ready for a lot of graphic scenes and feelings.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter 6 in which phasma is all of us

A week or so went by and since that encounter, they both seemed to be looking for excuses to make out with each other at any chance they got. Kylo started a seemingly unnecessary fight with Hux about music which lead into an angry make-out session until his phone started ringing with an incoming call from Rey. A day after that it was about Hux calling Kylo “Ben” and refusing to stop until Kylo had him pinned against a wall with his leg between his. However, they seemed to be getting along better though, with all of the usual tension and hostility being projected into the physical encounters.

Kylo found himself escaping their dorm room a lot less than normal, spending more time drawing there than he did in Rey’s room or with Finn and Poe. And when he wasn’t in their room it seemed that he kept running into Hux more often than ever before. One time he was leaning against the kitchen counter waiting for water to boil and typing on his phone when Hux turned up. No-one else was in there but it felt weird seeing him outside of their personal bubble. Kylo looked up from his phone to meet Hux’s eyes for a brief second before he turned around and went about his business, ignoring Kylo completely. His ginger hair was messier than usual and fell into his eyes as he opened the fridge. Kylo’s hand subconsciously shot up to his neck and his fingers brushed the bruises on his neck Hux left there only a few days ago. When he realised what was he doing he felt a bit foolish and went back to aimlessly browse the internet on his phone.

Another encounter occurred when Kylo took his Wacom tablet and laptop to the study lounge near their dorms because he was trying to break an art block he’s been having by changing his workplace and surroundings. Somehow he managed to convince Rey to take her revision and come with him. He was finishing up sketching what he needed when out of the corner of his eyes he spotted a familiar flock of ginger and black turtleneck. His hands froze and trying to make it look like he wasn’t directly searching for someone Kylo scanned the room quickly and sure enough, there was Hux, sitting just a few tables away seemingly focused on his books. His hair was once again almost flawless and his hand tugged restlessly on the collar of his turtleneck while his eyes scanned the pages. Kylo realised he was staring too long so he reluctantly tore his gaze away and looked at his screen. Seeing Hux anywhere that wasn’t their room made Kylo feel strangely inadequate. Like he didn’t actually know Hux at all — which was in a way true — and Kylo wasn’t entirely sure why that made him angry. He frowned at his reflection in the darker parts of his laptop screen and continued working which proved to be rather hard since whenever he caught Hux moving in his peripheral vision his eyes immediately travelled to him. He should probably stop doing that since he saw Rey giving him puzzled looks and the last thing he wanted was Rey catching on what was really going on.

***

“So, those hickeys,” Rey said smugly and waggled her eyebrows at him from her side of the sofa in the common room. Because karma apparently was _not_ on his side.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” lied Kylo and tried to sink further into the cushions which with his height and built looked slightly ridiculous.

“Don’t play dumb with me,” she commanded and proceeded to poke Kylo’s side with her foot.

“Oh yeah!” Finn chimed in from Poe’s lap on the sofa chair opposite of them, “I’ve been wondering since when the whole ‘I can’t get laid cause I’m a dickhead’ stopped being true when I saw them.”

“Fuck you,” Kylo raised his voice at Finn and was about to throw the nearest object at him when Rey poked him once more.

“Hmm.” She continued grinning and poking his side for emphasis. “I’m glad you and your roomie finally stopped arguing,” she said suggestively.

“Mind your own business,” Kylo said and was about to stand up and leave when Rey’s smile widened and she sat up.

“Ah, no. No going away until you admit that you’ve been screwing Hux,” Rey demanded.

“What?” Finn yelled, startling Poe so much he almost dropped the book he’s been reading. “You and _Hux_ ? But I thought you hated that guy! Also how the hell did _you_ know?” He turned to Rey accusingly.

“Oh please… It’s painfully obvious.” Rey folded her arms over her chest and leaned on the headboard.

“I still hate him,” Kylo mumbled and sat back.

“So you admit it?” Rey beamed, “I fucking knew it.”

“There’s nothing to admit. I haven’t been screwing anybody.”

“Ew. Details,” Rey waved her hand, “All I need to know is that those hickeys are in fact the work of your roommate who you had the hots for since we came here.”

“Oh my God, I’m going to kill you. I swear,” Kylo put his face into his hands and sighed, “I did not have hots for him, it just sort of… happened,” he said with his voice was muffled by his hands.

“You owe me five bucks,” said Poe to Finn.

“The bet was clearly about them fucking and if you listened you’d know that they haven’t fucked yet,” objected Finn.

“Those hickeys say otherwise.” Poe shrugged and set his chin on Finn’s shoulder with a grin.

“You had a bet about me and Hux _fucking_?” Kylo looked up in disbelief. “I hate all of you so much.”

“Yeah and I can still win,” Finn turned to Poe with a frown and then back to Kylo, “ _If_ only you don’t fuck him before December.”

“Please,” Poe grinned at Kylo, “There’s no need to wait. In fact, you should hurry up and fuck soon so _I_ can win.”

Kylo was basically fuming in anger at that point but he didn’t want to yell at them in front of the whole common room so he just stood up. “Unbelievable.” He started walking away and heard Rey basically wheezing in laughter behind him. _Hux was going to pay for leaving me with hickeys like a horny teenager._ He thought and stormed to the dorms, ready to kill anyone who stopped him.

“Next time don’t leave my neck looking like the fucking galaxy, will you?” yelled Kylo immediately after entering his room and spotting Hux at his desk. He looked at him confused for a second, trying to process why and what was Kylo yelling at him and then his mouth spread into a grin as he folded his arms casually behind his head.

“Oh don’t act like you didn’t enjoy it,” Hux teased him, “Besides, that took you way longer to throw a tantrum about than I expected. Thought you’d start crying as soon as you saw yourself in the mirror. Perhaps I overestimated your intelligence.”

Kylo clenched his fists and jaw in rage and started walking closer to Hux’s chair.

“What? You don’t have a good comeback so you’re just gonna angrily make out with me again?” Hux chuckled and stood up with his arms folded over his chest. “You should start working on your come backs or I can’t guarantee you won’t be walking around with hickeys for a _long_ time. Besides –.” His words were cut off by Kylo’s mouth, which seemed to be a regular occurrence these days. They seemed to be getting familiar with each other’s mouths because the heated making out was starting to be less messy, noticed Kylo as he purposefully rotated Hux and slowly pushed him towards the nearest wall.

“You’re going to pay for this,” threatened Kylo in a low voice when he pinned Hux’s hands at the sides of his head. He studied his face for a moment and studied Hux’s eyes who jumped between Kylo’s lips and eyes.

“Am I?” Hux lifted his left eyebrow and lifted his chin up, exposing his neck in the process. Kylo was silently thankful that he was wearing a regular t-shirt today for once because there was no collar or buttons standing in the way of his view. He stared back at Kylo through his eyelashes, his lips remaining in a perfectly straight line. When Kylo looked at him like this he realised there was more gray in his eyes than blue.

“Oh I’m going to make you pay,” Kylo promised with his head tilted ever so slightly to the side. He squeezed Hux’s wrists in emphasis and leaned forward.

“So dramatic,” Hux scoffed, only the “atic” part of the sentence came out as a breathy moan because Kylo was already sucking on the sensitive skin behind his ear. Kylo took a deep breath while he resolutely created a hickey on the most visible spot he could. Hux’s hair smelled of apples and his skin smelled like cinnamon and cologne and if Kylo wasn’t careful he could get drunk on that scent alone. He pushed his knee between Hux’s legs to feel him getting slowly hard already and with a satisfied grin moved further down Hux’s neck. He felt Hux’s heartbeat fast and hot on his tongue and he couldn’t help but smile again when he heard Hux take a sharp intake of breath.

Kylo moved his head away from Hux’s neck for a second to check the process of his work to find Hux had his eyes closed and his mouth was slightly ajar. His lips were red and looked so kissable and Kylo had to remind himself why he wasn’t kissing them. He looked at his neck to find several deep purple bruises going from Hux’s ear to his collarbone. Unmistakeable and hard to miss.

Hux opened his eyes and was about to say something sarcastic again, considering the look on his face when Kylo leaned in to kiss him again. Kylo could feel Hux’s erection against his knee, knowing he was probably equally hard himself. He parted from Hux’s lips and whispered “I’m going to suck your dick,” and without a warning dropped down on his knees cupping Hux’s asscheeks in his hands. He hooked his fingers on the fabric of his skinny jeans as Hux took fistfulls of hair. He pulled on them to make Kylo look up at him and studied him with a frown. Kylo frowned back and not interrupting their eye contact moved his hands to the front and undid the button on Hux’s jeans.

“Fuck,” whispered Hux as he stared intently at Kylo’s hands which were shaking a little. It was by no means the first blowjob Kylo’s ever given but it was the first one that he felt the pressure to be a good one. Kylo wasn’t exactly sure why but it probably had something to do with the fact that Hux would mock him if it wasn’t. Or the fact that Hux was probably smarter than all the men he sucked off before all together, not sure why that mattered though. Hux’s hands still haven’t released Kylo’s head from the slightly uncomfortable position so Kylo just looked up into Hux’s eyes again and refused to look away as he unzipped his jeans. He felt Hux’s cock through his briefs with his hand, still not breaking their eye contact. Hux wasn’t frowning anymore. In fact, he just looked at Kylo with his mouth slightly ajar and hungry eyes. Kylo raised his eyebrows and smirked, which earned him a stinging tug on his hair but eventually Hux’s death grip lessened which allowed Kylo to lower his head again.

Kylo looked down at Hux’s groin and lifted his right hand to slide it under Hux’s t-shirt. He felt the trail of hairs going down Hux’s stomach with his index finger and steadied his hips with his left hand. Kylo moved his hand teasingly up and down Hux’s pale stomach, barely touching the skin and felt Hux shudder. He was enjoying way too much for someone who was supposed to be pissed off at Hux, who seemed to realise this at the same time too because Kylo felt him impatiently tug at his hair so he stopped at the waistband of his underwear and pulled them down in one movement, setting Hux’s erection free. Kylo licked his lips and licked the underside of Hux’s cock excruciatingly slow before taking the tip into his mouth. He waited for a beat, working the tip but not moving further down. His right hand was around the hilt with his fingers resting on Hux’s pelvis and the left one was still holding onto his hip, gripping it harder as he felt Hux’s hips jerk forward involuntarily. Kylo took a deep breath through his nose and started moving his head up and down until he felt the tip hitting the back of his throat as he heard Hux moan softly.

“Fuck, Ren,” he gasped and gripped at Kylo’s hair tighter, stopping him from moving. Kylo didn’t take his mouth off Hux’s cock and looked up at him through his eyelashes. He teased him and slowly moved his tongue against the shaft from one side to another, enjoying how heavy Hux felt on his tongue. Hux breathed in sharply and let his Head fall back against the wall with a dull thud. “If you don’t stop I’m gonna…,” Hux started. Kylo kept sucking him off but let go with an obscenely wet sound when he felt Hux’s stomach spasm under his palm, indicating exactly how close he was. Upon doing so Hux let out a breath and without looking down whispered, “God.”

Kylo stood up, his knees silently thanking him, and practically towered over Hux who besides being a bit shorter than him has slid down the wall. He moved closer to Hux who was now frowning at him and without a word unzipped his own pants. He gripped Hux’s jaw whose hair was a mess and who was blushing involuntarily. Hux frowned at Kylo with glossy eyes dark with arousal. _He looks so fucking good._ Kylo thought and immediately followed it with _I hate him so fucking much._ For good measure. He watched Hux’s face closely, leaning in so much he felt his breath on his own mouth but not kissing him as he silently took both of their cocks together. Hux’s hands took a hold of Kylo’s biceps immediately after. After he started jerking them off together, Kylo had to close his eyes for a moment because the sensation was too _much_. He only opened them when he heard Hux gasp loudly and then feel his shuddering breath on his own lips. Kylo couldn’t hold on anymore and closed the gap between them, biting Hux’s bottom lip.

“Shit, Hux. I’m…” Kylo gasped between kissing Hux as his hand movements became more erratic and he could feel he was close.

“Yeah,” moaned Hux and gripped Kylo’s arm harder, “Fuck,” he sighed, kissed Kylo again in order to avoid making more sounds as he fucked into Kylo’s hand and finally came whilst letting out a small cry into Kylo’s mouth. Kylo could feel him shuddering against him in pleasure and aftershock, his cock still pulsating against Kylo’s own which sent him over the edge as well and he panted into the crook of Hux’s slightly sweaty neck as he felt his own orgasm fade.

They stood like that, Hux still pinned against the wall and Kylo slumped over him, breathing before Hux hesitantly let go of Kylo’s arms in favour of pulling up his pants which seemed to wake up Kylo from his trance and he hastily pulled his own jeans up. He looked at Hux suddenly very aware of how close they were standing and how strange that felt when they weren’t making out heatedly. “That was…” he started.

“Yeah,” agreed Hux, still a bit breathless and gave Kylo a weird look.

Kylo awkwardly stepped away, feeling foolish but not wanting to run away this time. He sat down on his bed and studied Hux who returned to his own bed and stared right back into Kylo’s eyes. He felt as if either of them addressed whatever was happening or moved any closer to the other the world would crumble around them. It felt like they were both trying to project their thoughts into the other’s brain and tried to tear out their answer from the other’s eyes but weren’t very successful.

“Can we just agree on a ‘no hickeys where they’re too visible’ rule?” asked Kylo, breaking the quiet that seemed to be getting too thick for people who kept telling themselves that they were just helping each other relieve stress.

“I’m not the one who did them purposefully but sure,” replied Hux and rolled his eyes.

“Whatever,” Kylo mumbled.

The ‘no visible hickeys’ rule prompted a blowjob from Hux before he littered Kylo’s chest in bite marks and left his pelvic bone with a few dark bruises the very next day.

***

Hux stared at the computer screen in front of him and tried to will the shaking in his hands away once again. The only time they weren’t shaking these days was when he had Ren on top of him, which he was _not_ thinking about at work. He shooed away his thoughts and started typing again with a concentrated frown on his face when he noticed out of the corner of his eye that Phasma next to him wasn’t working but actually had her chin propped against her palm and was giving him a very knowing look. He stopped typing and looked over at her with a raised eyebrow. “What the fuck?” he asked.

“Oh _nothing_ ,” she said casually, “Just noticed that _someone_ has been enjoying themselves recently.” She waved her index finger in the general direction of Hux’s neck. “Considering the fact that you only go out like never and don’t have Grindr installed on your phone right now and the only person you talk about is your annoying roommate I presume it is he who put those feisty fuckers all over your neck,” she finished with a smirk and crossed her arms on her chest, obviously proud of her little speech.

Hux was basically cutting off her head with lasers, that’s how intensely he was glaring. It took everything in him not to cover up his still unmistakably bruised neck with his hands then. “I hate you so fucking much.”

“I bet that’s what you tell Ren too,” she said and laughed, enjoying the torment and humiliation she was causing him.

Hux found out he didn’t like it very much when other people called Kylo ‘Ren’ because he felt like it was his own way of addressing Ren that wasn’t supposed to belong to anyone else and instantly felt foolish for thinking such thoughts.

“I knew this was going to happen from day one anyway.” Phasma swayed from side to side on her chair, still smiling at him.

“Nothing’s happening, it’s just sex,” Hux stated the facts, still frowning.

“Mhm,” hummed Phasma and nodded solemnly.

“What?” Hux narrowed his eyes, silently daring her to imply anything.

“Nothing,” she replied innocently and returned to her screen.

Hux glared at her profile before returning to his own screen. “Good,” he said warningly. He was _not_ thinking about how his heart was beating a tad faster than before. _Who cares if Phasma knew that he and Ren have been screwing? It’s not like there’s anything beyond the physical between them._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, I've been thinking of changing the work's title but I'm still not set on what the title should be. Anyways, hope you've enjoyed this. :) Next chapter will probably be a bit longer also feelings are about to be involved hehehe.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this chapter was too long so i decided to make it into two chapters. therefore chapter 8 is basically done i just need to finish the last scene and have it beta read :)

Hux was kneeling on Ren’s bed, moaning — which seemed to be becoming a regular occurrence this past week — as Ren fucked his asshole with his tongue, his hands were cupping his asscheeks and pulling them apart. Hux at that moment thought he never felt a so hot and wet, never felt pleasure like this. Not even when he let that one hot server fuck him during that one posh boring gala in LA his father made him attend last winter, which he considered the best lay he ever had until Ren, who had his tongue buried in Hux’s ass and moved it in ways that made him shudder and moan embarrassingly loud. He felt so exposed and helpless like this but it also felt way too good.

Then Ren reached forward to grab Hux’s almost painfully hard dick which made Hux gasp, “Fuck, Ren.” But instead of continuing, Ren just kept on holding him without actually stroking him. Ren stopped rimming him too and he could feel Ren’s breath on his entrance. He felt like he was going insane from all the sensations. He knew this was his end. He also knew that if Ren didn’t start doing something  _ soon _ he would die.

“‘Fuck Ren.’ What?” He heard Ren’s husky voice from behind, “What do you want me to do?” Ren asked menacingly. 

Apparently, Hux was not going to die but he was going to murder Ren because he was enjoying torturing Hux as it seemed. 

“Ren I swear to god, if you don’t do  _ something _ soon I won’t suck you off for a week.” 

“Do what?”

“Something,” breathed out Hux impatiently.

“Say please,” demanded Ren and Hux could guess he was smirking stupidly.

“I’m not begging you,” barked Hux but Ren excruciatingly slowly ran his tongue up from Hux’s balls all the way to his entrance. “Fuck. Fuck. Okay. Please, Ren.”

“Hmmm,” Ren hummed against Hux and he could feel his brain falling apart. Ren’s grip on his buttcheek was just tight enough as he moved his hand up and down the length of Hux’s cock and Hux felt his saliva drip down his asscrack, all of this making Hux grip at Ren’s sheets and roll his eyes back.

“I’m so close,” Hux grunted and Ren quickened his pace as he bit down on Hux’s buttcheek. Ren then moved so that he was kneeling over Hux, his bare torso flushed against Hux’s back and his hard-on underneath the fabric of his boxer briefs was pressed against Hux’s ass. Hux instinctively reached towards the hand Kylo was using to support himself against the mattress and linked their fingers in a bone-crushing hold. Ren bit his shoulder in return, sending small jolts of pain through him as he quickened the pace of his hand on Hux. The feeling of Ren’s skin against his own was so overwhelming and his hips moved in time with Ren’s hand. The orgasm he felt building up in him since they threw themselves at each other was so close he felt it everywhere. 

“Ah,” he gasped softly and with a few erratic jerks of his hips came harder than he could remember in a long time while squeezing Ren’s fingers so much his knuckles turned white. Hux’s whole body shook through the aftershock and he bowed his head down, mouth open and eyes shut in pleasure, as his hair fell over his forehead.

Ren chuckled and teasingly stroked Hux’s cock once more which made him shudder and sigh weakly from the overstimulation. Ren kept grinding against Hux’s backside, biting his pale freckled shoulder a bit closer to his neck, forming another teeth shaped bruise there, as Hux slowly came down from his climax.

Suddenly, Hux let his hand give out and flop on the bed. He pried his hand away from Ren’s, angry at the stupidity of his sex crazed brain that thought holding Ren’s fucking hand was okay, and turned around to face him.

Ren looked at him wide-eyed as if he was surprised that it was actually Hux underneath him all along and Hux could feel his traitorous cheeks turn crimson under the scrutinizing gaze, so he quickly grabbed Ren’s sides, before Ren could actually look into his eyes for too long when Hux didn’t have the upper hand and attempted to flip them over, but Ren is way too big and his muscles were still like jello from the orgasm. He frowned at Ren, whose hair was falling down around his face, framing it and softening his edges. Ren scoffed and flipped them around in one swift motion, somehow managing not to hit himself or Hux against the wall. 

Once they were in the position Hux has aimed for, he moved back and with his mouth in a tight line, eyes locked on Ren’s face like a predator, pulled Ren’s underwear down freeing his cock which was, as everything about Ren, huge. Instead of doing anything, he kept staring at Ren and raised one eyebrow. If Ren could have his fun making Hux suffer so could he. Ren raised his head slightly so he could watch him impatiently and Hux made sure to look him in the eye as he slowly licked the underside of Ren’s dick. He stopped at the tip and his lips twitched as he saw that Ren was about to fucking lose it. 

“I know what you’re doing,” Ren snarked, voice clouded with anticipation and arousal, “But I can see that you want to suck me off as much as I want to feel your hot mouth on my cock. So I’m not begging you.” 

Hux wouldn’t have guessed Ren for a dirty talker. Demanding sure, but not verbal. What a fucking manchild Ren was. He sat up and stopped what he was doing altogether just because Ren was also kind of right that he did want to suck Ren off, to see him writhe and whimper, and he hated him with burning passion for that. He pushed into Ren’s muscular chest with his palm and leaned a bit forward.

“What?” asked Ren, tilting his head to the side on the sheets, “You don’t like people ordering you around because you like to be in charge so much?” he kept talking in that terribly deep voice of his.

“Fuck you. This isn’t a therapy session,” Hux shot at him. “So either shut the fuck up and pull my hair while I suck you off or help yourself. After all, I got what I wanted from you already,” he said a bit threateningly. Ren’s eyes were blazing with fury but he kept his mouth shut.

“That’s what I thought,” chuckled Hux and moved back to his position before, this time not looking into Ren’s eyes. He gave his cock a few strokes before he took Ren into his mouth, keeping his hand at the base and working the part he couldn’t take. He felt Ren’s hand travel into his hair and tug lightly at first but then tightening. He felt Ren’s pulse on his tongue and started building up his rhythm. He looked up and met Ren’s eyes before taking in as much of him in his mouth as he could before he started choking, making Ren shake and only half-successfully stifle a moan.

He moved his head at a steady speed, focusing on using his tongue just right and enjoying the involuntary jerks of Ren’s hips and throaty whines, making him a mess. He knew Ren had to be close to coming, judging by the fact that he could no longer hold back the noises he was making and the tightening death grip which he had on Hux’s hair.

“Your… I’m close,” Ren muttered and attempted to pull Hux away. Hux’s one hand pushed Ren’s hips further into the mattress when he felt the muscles of his stomach tighten signaling his oncoming orgasm. Immediately after he felt Ren’s come hit the back of his throat. He swallowed the first two shots before pulling away and watching Ren, who had his arm slung over his face, leaving only his mouth visible, shake and his sweaty chest rise up and down with his rapid breaths. Hux pried Ren’s arm away from his face and pinned it next to his head against the bed before taking Ren’s bottom lip between his teeth and then letting Ren’s tongue find his way inside his mouth. He was sure Ren could taste himself in Hux’s mouth. 

Hux moved away and leaned his back against the wall which was too cold on his skin. He felt too exposed sitting there naked like that so he reached to the end of the bed where his boxer briefs landed and pulled them on before leaning back against the wall. He then looked back at Ren to see him laying next to him as he left him, hair a mess, mouth red and staring at the ceiling intensely. The only sound in the room was their breathing and the silence started to become a bit too overwhelming. Hux wasn’t opposed to the fact that Ren stopped running out of the room as soon as they even touched but he also didn’t know what to say in moments like this. What are you supposed to say to a person you hate but who also is pretty hot after you have sex? ‘That was fun’? Surely not.

Ren tore his gaze away from the ceiling and eyed Hux’s torso which besides being pale and covered with freckles had a nice set of hickeys accompanied by teeth marks on his shoulders. He returned Ren’s stare with an irritated frown.

“What? I didn’t break the rule!” Ren protested Hux’s unspoken complaints and rolled his eyes. Instead of replying, Hux slid down from the bed and walked over to his own to check the time on his phone. He could feel Ren’s eyes on him from behind and would bet that Ren was checking out his ass when he heard him ask, “What time is it?” 

“Almost six,” Hux replied after eyeing his phone screen and haven’t expected Ren’s reaction to be a panicked stream of swear words. He turned around to face him and saw that Ren was already standing up from his bed and jumping on one leg while he pulled on his underwear. 

“Where’s the fire?” Hux asked, slightly amused at Ren’s frantic search for his clothes in the pile on the floor where both of them threw them.

“Family Skype call. Mother’s gonna kill me if I’m not there,” Ren explained as he fumbled with the zipper on his jeans.  _ Of course his family would have regular Skype calls with their kids who were studying away from home. Charming.  _ Hux thought bitterly and noticed too late that Ren put on Hux’s t-shirt from the pile instead of his own. Luckily he didn’t wear one of his nicely fitted shirts but a rather baggy striped top that day. Well, it was baggy on him but Ren’s muscles filled it in pretty nicely. What the hell was he thinking about, he didn’t want Ren stealing his clothes! 

“Hey! That’s my shirt!” he yelled at Ren who was pocketing his phone and heading towards the door.

“Oh shit, right…” He looked down at his own chest, surprised, “I gotta go though, sorry. I’ll wash it,” he said and with that ran out of the room, leaving Hux behind, standing in between their beds in nothing but underwear.  _ Did he just say ‘sorry’? _

***

When Ren ran into Rey’s dorm room, she was already sitting on her bed with Finn and Leia’s voice echoed through the slightly flat sounding laptop speakers. “Is that Ben? Glad you decided to show up,” she raised her voice as Kylo sat down on Rey’s free side.

“Hi mom, dad,” he greeted his parents on the screen and leaned against the wall, trying to even out his breathing, painfully aware of how messy his hair looked. He heard his father talk to Rey about something class related but to his brain it sounded like white noise because all he could think of was how much the t-shirt he was wearing smelled like Hux and how soft it felt. He wanted to pull it closer to his face but stopped when he noticed Rey eyeing him suspiciously. He turned his gaze towards the screen, focusing on his mom’s face.

The hour or so they usually spent talking to each other - or rather Rey, Leia, Han and Finn talked while Kylo grunted and sometimes made a comment or answered Leia’s questions - passed pretty quickly and before Kylo knew it, Finn was already closing the laptop and yawning.

“Hey Ben, do tell, where did you get that shirt? I've never seen you wear it. Or did you trade it for your socks?” Rey questioned him immediately after the Skype call ended and gestured lazily at Kylo’s bare feet.

“I'm not talking to you about this because whatever I say gives you fuel,” Kylo glared at her and was about to stand up but Rey continued.

“Dark blue and red stripes are not your thing usually. Hmm.” She raised his eyebrows grinning madly.

“I'm leaving,” stated Kylo resolutely but before he could exit the room he heard Finn yell, “Say hi to Hux from us!” followed by his and Rey’s cackling.  _ Fuck. _

***

Another week passes by and Kylo finds himself on Hux’s bed several times as a result of petty fights. The positive development in that situation was that they seemed to be getting slightly more comfortable with each other, if in no other way, then at least in the physical, and they also managed to exchange a few not completely hostile sentences. 

Kylo also spent way too much time hunched over his desk, sketching portraits and studying for his anatomy coursework and tearing out his hair, trying to formulate semi decent poetry analysis. He couldn't risk trying to draw in Hux’s presence for too long, because deadlines were gnawing on him and they had a tendency to jump one another if they were under pressure in each other's vicinity for more hours, so Kylo begrudgingly accepted Rey’s offer of a study group in Finn and Poe’s dorm room. 

His hair was tucked behind his ears and he was biting his bottom lip in focus. He was almost done shading a sketch of a man standing with his back to him and looking to the side. He thought it was one of his best pieces in that particular class and happily added a few finishing touches before setting it aside.

“I'm gonna need a burger after this paper,” groaned Poe from the bed and rubbed his eyes.

“I'm gonna need at least a burger  _ and  _ large french fries,” agreed Finn next to him and poked Poe’s side gently.

“Is there a second you two  _ don't  _ think about junk food?” Kylo glared at them. 

“We go to the gym three times a week. We're allowed,” Poe said and gave him the finger.

“That's not how it fucking works,” huffed Kylo angrily.

“Shut up, Ben,” Rey scolded him from the opposite desk, not looking up. Kylo wanted to continue arguing but then he remembered the pile of papers in front of him and returned to his work in silence.

The sky behind the window turned the color of ink and Kylo was in the middle of his third yawn in a row when Rey startled him by sneaking up on him and taking his sketches to look through them.

“Give them back,” Kylo whined and reached towards her to grab the papers. She lifted her hands above her head sooner than he could reach them though and laughed.

“Let your sis have a look.” She pouted. “Besides you know that I think your art’s great so shush.”

“Whatever,” grumbled Kylo, rolling his eyes.

Rey shuffled through the papers for a bit when her eyes widened and she flipped the sketch around. “Hey, Finn. Doesn't this look familiar,” she smiled mischievously.

“Oh boy! Someone's got it  _ bad _ ,” laughed Finn upon looking at the sketch Kylo recently finished. 

“What?” asked Kylo and Poe in unison.

“Don't tell me you don't see it!” Rey gasped and gave him back the papers, pointing her finger at the face of the man on Kylo’s sketch. He stared at it and the realisation flooded over him along with a wave of chills down his spine. Kylo knew why it looked familiar to Rey. It was Hux’s face but void of that frown he always had. He fucking drew Hux without even knowing about it or realising it. The feeling of doom in his chest was quickly replaced by boiling anger. This was  _ not  _ happening.  _ Can he get out of my fucking head for at least one minute?  _

He could feel Rey’s gaze on him and closed his eyes for a second, trying not to let his anger show, even though all he wanted was to punch someone for being so pathetic and weak.

“You didn't notice before, huh?” she asked, but this time warmer and not teasingly.

“No,” he replied trying to appear nonchalant, only it came out too quiet.

“You're like the weirdest couple I've ever seen,” Poe said and shook his head, “You're both such assholes and that’s why you’re fit for each other.”

“We’re. Not. A couple,” growled Kylo and grit his teeth. Fucking didn’t mean  _ anything. _ He didn’t have shit in common with Hux. Besides, they could never date, they’re barely able to share a room. It would never work.

“No of course not.” Poe nodded. 

“I’m  _ not  _ having this conversation,” Kylo fumed and looked at Rey, hoping for help which he knew she wouldn’t provide.

“Suit yourself,” said Poe and shrugged.

It wasn’t that the thought of actually dating Hux was so repulsing to Kylo, it was more about the fact that they couldn’t stand each other’s personalities and no amount of sexual attraction could fix that. Well, they were both very devoted, liked fashion and hated people so there was that. Come to think of it, Hux was pretty fascinating but he never let anyone know anything substantial about him and it frustrated Kylo.  _ Why the fuck do I even care? I don’t. Physical attraction. Just that. _

And so, betrayed by his own brain and angry at everything, but especially at himself, is how Kylo ended up tearing up an old punching bag while boxing the next day.

***

Kylo slipped into the dorm room to discover that Hux was playing his music out loud, which in itself was a rare occasion, whilst studying at his desk. When he entered, Hux looked up from his notes for a second, acknowledging that he saw him come in before returning to the pages in front of him. The music playing was some hypnotic electro that you’d find in a Spotify playlist for studying.

“Turn it off,” Kylo murmured.

Hux turned around and smirked. “Funny. It’s usually me saying this line,” he said but indicated in no other way that he found it actually funny.

“At least my music is  _ music  _ and not just one electronic beat repeated over and over again,” Kylo objected, which Hux awarded him with a middle finger for, and eventually turned off his music. Kylo approached Hux but stopped before they got too close and leaned against Hux’s bed. “You know,” he started, crossing his arms.

“Hmm,” Hux hummed in question and looked up at Kylo, but his expression was frozen in that resting bitch face as always. 

“If we both want to play music out loud and never actually play anything we both like, why don’t we try making a playlist of songs we both find tolerable.”

“That’s gonna be an awfully short playlist,” said Hux and shrugged. “But sure, I don’t see why not. Although you are forbidden from adding any screamo metal and emo bullshit there.”

Kylo scowled at him, puffing out his cheeks. “Fine, but you can’t have any ambient shit and please don’t make all of your songs by  _ Bastille _ .” 

“Fine.” Hux tilted his head. 

“Fine,” Kylo repeated after him and turned to walk away. He stopped halfway and looked at Hux again. “Add me on Spotify and I’ll start the playlist.” 

Hux nodded and Kylo quickly busied himself with looking through his bag.

It took them a few days to fill up the playlist to make it last at least an hour and a half which consisted of a lot of arguments about a song number per interpret limit and Kylo denying liking _ Florence and the Machine _ before Hux accused him of lying since he could  _ hear  _ him listen to her because he played his music awfully loud when he wore headphones. They both surprisingly agreed on liking  _ Kasabian  _ and Kylo had only a fifteen-minute speech about how  _ alt-J  _ were better before indie teens discovered them at which Hux just rolled his eyes and ignored him. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the playlist in question actually exists on my Spotify and here's a link for it: https://open.spotify.com/user/teddyblk/playlist/6mqu2MLfGVj8BAYP2eR2TD  
> i'm gonna be adding some more songs to it as i write the fic :)


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> many thanks to romi for being my personal hype man while i wrote this chapter and for loving kylo's dramatic thoughts

Kylo was leaning against a wall inside some fellow uni student’s living room, holding a plastic cup filled with what was probably more vodka than coke, and glared at people around him. He would need at least three cups of strong booze before he’d be able to socialise with any of them and actually enjoy the music. He looked down at his cup and drank the whole thing in one swig before pushing through the crowd towards the kitchen to fill it back up. He awkwardly reached behind a couple making out next to the counter to grab a bottle of vodka and a half empty coke bottle next to it while he silently cursed Rey for dragging him there. He sighed and poured himself a generous amount of alcohol, which he immediately gulped down. It left a burning sensation in his throat and his mouth curled in disgust. He poured another shot which he diluted down with the coke this time, set the bottles down, away from the couple, and left the kitchen. He could feel the buzz from the first drink already and was frowning a little bit less. 

The night was moving fast, and Kylo was not a lightweight by any means, but Rey could outdrink him any day or night, because he was already on his fifth (or was it sixth?) drink and he felt pretty drunk already but Rey, who was standing next to him and holding an almost empty whiskey bottle, looked completely sober, except for the fact that she had smeared lipstick print on her cheek. Kylo just got away from the group of dancing people to rest in the empty corner for a second when she appeared out of nowhere.

“Having fun?” She smiled at him and poured the rest of the whiskey into Kylo’s cup. 

“It’s okay.” He shrugged and leaned his head against the wall. His mind kept going to weird places as always when he drank. “Fuck. I think I’m drunk,” Kylo said and laughed. 

“I can tell,” stated Rey, still smiling.

“How are you not wasted?” he asked in disbelief, sluggishly pointing somewhere towards the bottle in her hand. “Are you a witch or something?”

Rey chuckled. “Maybe.”

“Whatever.” Kylo raised the cup to his mouth and frown at the contents in it, he felt like the hand holding it wasn’t even his own. Where did the booze come from? He shrugged and downed the drink before setting the cup down on a nearby table. He could feel the loud bass tones in his chest and tapped his hand against his thigh to the rhythm. Drunk on shitty but free alcohol, loud music, Rey who wasn’t arguing with him for once and yet Kylo felt like something was missing. It was probably just the vodka talking.

Kylo looked around the room, scanning the crowd and noticed a girl with a buzz cut and dark lips making her way through the room towards where they were standing next to each other. “Cute girl approaching,” he murmured and nudged Rey’s shoulder with his elbow.

“I don’t think this one’s coming over for me,” Rey replied with a grin, “Shame.”

“Please no,” he whined desperately and turned to face her, “Talk to me about something.”

“Too late,” Rey said and started laughing when the girl reached them, smiling at Kylo.

“Hi, I’m —,” she started to introduce herself to him only for Kylo to interrupt her mid-sentence.

“Not Hux.” Fuck. Did he really say that out loud? God, he was wasted. “Fuck that guy,” he said to himself under his breath.

“Excuse me?” the girl asked equally confused and offended.

Rey rolled her eyes at him and turned to her, smiling. “His boyfriend.” 

“Not my boyfriend. He hates me.” Kylo pouted.

“It’s complicated,” Rey clarified.

“Oh-kay,” buzz cut girl frowned and walked away, looking slightly uncomfortable as she turned her head around to look at Kylo one last time.

Kylo sighed. “I wonder what’s he doing?” he was slurring his words a little as his rational part of the brain fought the drunk part on whether he should stop thinking about Hux or if he should text Hux. “I”m gonna text him.”

“No! No you’re not!” yelled Rey in horror and reached out to grab Kylo’s phone which he just clumsily pulled out of his pocket.

Kylo dodged her hand and unlocked his screen. “You’re not the boss of me. He’s hot and gives great blowjobs and has great hair and I hate him because he’s not here making out with me,” Kylo stammered out while he looked for his texting app in confusion. 

“Oh my god, you poor moron. You actually like him!” Rey yelled as she kept reaching over Kylo’s head to pull his arm down, “If it’s all as you say it is, it’s my responsibility as your sibling to stop you from texting him and embarrassing yourself.”

“Then what the fuck am I supposed to do?”

“Well, if you do like him, why not actually ask him out on a date or flirt with him?”

“That’s a terrible idea. If you knew him you’d know. You don’t know him though. I don’t even really know him. But I’m gonna make him... Make me… I’m… I’ll make him talk to me!” Kylo finally constructed a sentence and sighed, his glazed eyes looking up at the ceiling.

“He must be really good in bed because I’ve never seen you like this. Also, he’s like a major asshole as far as I know.” Rey thought out loud looking at some wet patch on the carpet in front of them, careful to keep Kylo’s hands in her line of sight though.

“He really is. He’s terrible. But so am I and I know that’s not everything. It can’t be.”

“Sure,” she nodded solemnly, not really listening.

“I don’t know. I’m fucked.” Kylo sighed again. The floor didn’t feel as stable as he would like it to feel and his mind kept wandering to how amazing it felt when Hux was towering over him as he sucked him off. How they actually had some decent conversation during which he felt like Hux was showing him something more. It was stupid of him to think that a few exchanged words over their daily schedules went deeper than seeing Hux completely exposed on his bed for him, but somehow it did. Like it wasn’t only about sex. It probably was though. Only about sex, that is. To Hux at least it was and what did it matter that Kylo  _ maybe _ found Hux’s hair too nice, his insults too smart, the way he didn’t hold back around him too raw, and his jawline too sharp to resist.

“Let’s get you a cab, bro,” Rey decided and patted his shoulder, “Before you start telling random people about your song ideas and how you miss Hux.”

“Okay,” he agreed.

“Come on.” She tugged on his sleeve as she started moving in the direction of the exit.

***

Kylo fumbled with the keys, dropping them only once in the process before successfully opening the dorm room door. He stepped in, somewhat clumsily, leaning on the dresser as he closed and locked the door behind him. He stayed sloped against the wood for a bit, turning his head slowly to look at Hux who was on his bed. His face was illuminated by a cool light from his laptop screen and he was staring at Kylo. Hux was studying him, trying to figure him out but the ever so slight frown on his face indicated he wasn’t successful. His eyes were so intense, the strange light made them look grayer than usual, and his hair was uncharacteristically messy like he just woke up. Kylo noticed the circles under his eyes too. He began noticing them last week but they kept getting worse each day as workload and essays piled up and Kylo wanted to make them disappear, to will them away, even though he knew it wasn’t possible. He should probably stop staring at Hux before it got weird. Right. He stumbled toward his bed and sat down on the unmade duvet.

“You’re cute,” he said, his eyes locked with Hux’s.  _ Totally not weird. Just the truth _ . Kylo smirked with only one corner of his lips and his eyes gleamed a little.

“You’re drunk,” stated Hux and shook his head, looking down at his lap trying to avoid meeting Kylo’s eyes. When he glanced up, hoping maybe that Kylo would argue with him but all he saw was Kylo sprawled across his bed, happily sleeping.

Hux hoped he’d wake up with an awful hangover in the morning. He really did.

***

Hux ended up giving Ren one of his best blowjobs ever, received a handjob and several new bruises in return and it wasn’t even six in the afternoon. They were sitting next to each other on Ren’s bed, backs against the cold wall, laps covered with Ren’s sheets, naked shoulders so close they were almost touching but neither dared to move closer and actually make them collide. And Hux was right, Ren did wake up with a hangover that morning and wouldn’t stop complaining about it so much that he yelled at him after which Ren just started whining that he felt sick to which Hux replied he wasn’t his caretaker and basically threw him out of their room, saying he wasn’t allowed to come back before he ate something greasy, drank coffee and shit-ton of water. He did not do it because he wanted Ren to stop feeling sick (Ren could be miserable forever for all he cared), but rather he refused to listen to him cry about it when he was working on his essay. It worked though, because Ren returned an hour later, looking considerably less pale and went to take a shower before Hux had the chance to force Ren to thank him. 

“Can I fuck you?” Ren asked all of a sudden, his head turned to face Hux but one side of his face was hidden behind his hair.

“Now?” Hux questioned, alarmed. It wasn’t that he hadn’t thought about it before because he has. A lot. In detail. But he didn’t expect Ren to be so bold about it since he was the one running away all the time like sex was something icky. 

“No. I mean later.” Ren kept his eyes pinned on Hux expectantly. 

“Yeah sure. We might as well have fun and go all the way,” Hux said and shrugged a little, suddenly feeling very awkward and uncomfortable under Kylo’s stare like he could see his thoughts if their eyes met for too long. “I didn’t think you’d ask. I thought we would just do it eventually,” he mused and ran his hand through his hair in a feeble attempt at making them neat again.

“I didn’t think you’d want to,” Ren mumbled and stared intently at his hands that were resting in his lap.

“Take a dick up my ass? Have you met me?” Hux chuckled but it sounded more like he was moving venom around inside his mouth, ready to bite Ren and put him down for good. Ren was looking at Hux again and his eyes were moving up and down from Hux’s bruised torso to his lips. For a second there it seemed like Ren was going to move and kiss Hux just then and he didn’t like that. He liked kissing Ren, sure, but they never did that just because they could so he quickly slid off the bed with whatever grace he could muster up before Ren had the chance to make up his mind. “I’m going for a smoke,” announced Hux and started to put on his underwear. 

“Why don’t you just open the window and do it there?” Ren asked, not even bothering to pretend that he wasn’t blatantly staring at Hux’s ass. 

Hux turned around with pinched eyebrows, looking furious, but nowhere near as mad as he could look. “Are you fucking kidding me right now?” He threw his hands out. “You’ve been beating me up about it and how it smells ever since we got here and  _ now  _ you decide you don’t mind me smoking from our window!” he ranted and turned to look for his pack of cigarettes and a lighter in his bag, hoping it would distract him enough that he wouldn’t have to punch Ren.

“It does smell!” objected Ren loudly and crossed his arms over his chest, not moving from his mattress. “Just this once I don’t care though,” he said more quietly but the natural depth of his voice made the sentence resonate right in Hux’s ribcage. 

Hux pulled on the jumper that was hanging from his chair and pulled it quickly over his head, grumbling, “Suit yourself, asshole.” Hux shrugged and went ahead to open the window. He used Ren’s chair as a stool, pulled himself elegantly up and sat down on their windowsill. He lit up his cigarette and took a long drag to start it before putting his hand out of the window to keep the smoke from staying in their room and blew it up toward the sky. He took another drag and let himself enjoy it more this time, feeling the hit in his chest and leaned his head against the window frame. He shivered, and only then noticed how cold it actually got. It was already mostly dark outside, nature’s reminder that winter was approaching fast. 

Hux looked down on the path surrounded by trees and bushes that were underneath their building and spotted a few students walking there, talking so loudly he could hear that they were talking about soccer. He continued smoking his cigarette, systematically bringing his hand up to his lips, breathing in and then slowly out and thought back to high school when he used to play soccer too. He wouldn’t say he missed it because, in all honesty, he hated almost all of his past teammates, but he did crave that pleasant exhaustion he felt after practice and the adrenaline rush he got whenever he scored.  _ I should probably start going to the gym or something. _

“You know you’re fucking up your lungs with that, right?” Ren’s voice, that always seemed to sound whiny to Hux for some reason, interrupted him from his thoughts and he turned around to face him. Ren was wearing his underwear and a t-shirt again but other than that it seemed that he hasn’t moved an inch.

“What do you care?” Hux threw back at him, sharply and took a hit from his 

“I don’t,” Ren reassured him and kept eyeing Hux hungrily from head to toe. Hux felt very aware of his posture and the way the jumper was loosely slipping off one side of his shoulders, exposing his collarbones and one of the fresh hickeys. He spun his head away again and sighed when he felt the cool breeze on his face that was getting uncomfortably hot. Why did Ren have to be so intense all the time? So everywhere? Was every art major like this or was Ren just a nutjob? Hux only noticed how long he’s been sitting there, staring at the trees below him when he finished his cigarette. He stubbed out the rest of it against the outside wall and flicked it down toward the path underneath.

“Why did you do that?” Ren asked in distress. 

“Do what?” Hux raised his eyebrows as he slipped down from the windowsill.

“Throw it out of the window when there’s a bin right here?” Ren pointed to the plastic bin in the other corner of their room in irritation. 

Hux rolled his eyes and went back to sit down on his own bed, not even bothering to put his pants back on.

“You’re horrible,” Ren shook his head, not looking away from Hux. 

“Please, tell me something I don’t know yet,” responded flatly and opened his laptop. He immediately pressed shuffle on their collaborative playlist and right after that opened the news article he was reading before Ren attacked him with his mouth, to let Ren clearly know he was done speaking to him. 

***

Kylo kept thinking about that exchange he and Hux had a few days ago and couldn’t help but feel anticipation at the thought of actually fucking him. He kept thinking about Hux a lot in general. He wasn’t sure whether he wanted them taking this  _ thing _ to another level change something between them or if he liked this strange state they were in. It would be stupid of him to say that nothing was different compared to the first few times. They weren’t becoming any less desperate or rough, but they stopped initiating fights in order to make-out. Last few times simply happened because Ren started them. Everyone likes sex though, right? It didn’t mean anything.

Kylo came to the drunken conclusion that last Friday that maybe he did want it to mean something, but wasn’t exactly sure what. All he knew was that Hux’s hands made his skin burn up and there was hardly anything else he enjoyed more these days than making Hux fall apart underneath his touch. He should probably stop thinking about all of this because even though he was in the shower, he knew Hux was in their room, probably finishing up his assignments for the next fucking year or something, even though it was past eleven already, and the prospect of Hux getting him off and him getting Hux off was much nicer than having a quick one alone in the gross communal showers.

When Kylo entered their room, he was only wearing his sweatpants and a towel around his shoulders which was soaking up water dripping down from his wet hair and just as he thought, Hux was still sitting at his desk with two empty mugs behind his laptop. The only light was coming from Hux’s desk lamp, putting the room in a dim barely lit atmosphere. It smelled very faintly of cigarettes in there and cold air was coming in from the opened window. “You were smoking here again?” he asked, only slightly antagonistic as he took out his hair dryer. 

“Shut up.” Hux’s eyes didn’t even flicker away from the laptop screen as he continued to type with one hand whilst he rubbed his forehead with the other.

By the time Kylo finished drying his hair, Hux apparently gave up on his work, because he was folding his pants and putting them away. Kylo couldn’t help himself but admire his, admittedly pale but slender legs, and when Hux noticed him, he didn’t even pretend that he wasn’t staring.

“Like what you see?” Hux teased him.

“Don’t flatter yourself,” he responded and immediately after wanted to bang his head against the wall.  _ I thought we agreed Hux was hot!  _ He mentally yelled at his own brain. 

Hux lifted his left eyebrow and smirked. “Oh really?” He closed his dresser and started slowly walking towards Kylo. “I’m not the one who was begging to fuck me just a few days ago, though,” he purred. Kylo could feel his heart racing faster and damned Hux for knowing exactly how to play with his head. Hux was getting dangerously close and his eyes were flashing with a predatory gleam that made Kylo’s knees a bit weaker. He could rip Kylo open with his bare hands and Kylo would let him if Hux kept looking at him like that. Hux could take anything he wanted from Kylo and he would be helpless. 

“Let’s see who’s the one begging when you’re on your knees for me,” Kylo threatened and watched Hux’s lips as he stopped two feet away from him. 

“Who says I’ll be on my knees?” Hux asked, voice as sweet as molasses as he reached between them to grab Kylo’s dick through the soft material of his sweatpants, feeling him harden under his touch.

Kylo couldn’t stop the gasp escaping from his mouth but it could barely leave his lips when Hux was kissing him and feeling every inch of his mouth with his tongue. Kylo finally moved his hands too and firmly cupped Hux’s ass with them, noticing how perfectly it fitted in them. Hux moved his hand away, releasing Kylo’s crotch and buried it in his hair instead, tugging at it just enough to make the pain pleasurable. Kylo smirked into Hux’s mouth as he started backing Hux to the direction of his bed. When Hux’s thighs hit the wooden board, he bit on Kylo’s lower lip in spite but still let Kylo lift him up with his hands in the curve between his ass and legs and sit him down on the duvet. Hux spread his legs so his knees were on either side of Kylo, who was still standing up. Kylo gripped at Hux’s thighs and spread them even further apart, before sinking to his knees and looking up at Hux who was staring at him in anticipation with his pupils dilated, lips wet and reddened.

Kylo smiled and started peeling down the band on Hux’s underwear who compliantly moved his hips up slightly, so that Kylo could pull them down completely, revealing his almost fully hard cock. Hux tugged at his hair, urging him forward so Kylo licked his lips and closed the gap between their bodies, taking Hux into his mouth almost completely. 

Hux panted and tightened his grip on Kylo’s hair as he felt Kylo move his lips up and down along his shaft, hot, slick and so good. “I thought you wanted to fuck me,” Hux said provocatively but it came out somewhat breathy.

Kylo’s tongue swiped one long stripe up the underside of Hux’s dick before he stood back up and leaned in so close their noses were merely inches apart. “I am,” he whispered and then walked away to look through his drawers. Hux kept sitting on his bed, looking vaguely dumbfounded, when he saw Kylo approaching him again with a bottle of lube in his hand he picked himself back up, swiftly pulled his t-shirt over his head and threw it on the ground. He scooted backwards, positioning himself along the mattress so Kylo could climb up onto the bed as well. He frowned down at Kylo’s sweatpants and reached out to tug at them. “Off with these,” he mumbled. 

“So eager,” Kylo smiled smugly as he let Hux strip him down.

“Reconsider,” stated Hux bluntly, “You’re the one with no underwear underneath.” Hux nudged the pants off the bed and gave Kylo’s erection a couple of strokes. Kylo bit his lip and then lifted Hux, flopping him down on the mattress. Hux’s hair was loose around his head, giving him a ginger halo, his cheeks were red and he was so hard Kylo felt flames in his stomach just looking at him. He looked over to the side of the bed where the lube was waiting again and examined Hux’s face for permission. 

“No condoms?” Hux asked. 

Kylo ran two fingers up and down Hux’s cock teasingly and painfully slowly, making him twitch and breathe in sharply. He didn’t look Hux in the eyes but studied his convulsing stomach instead as he ran one of his hands up Hux’s thigh and kept the other on his dick. “I’m clean,” he hummed in suggestion. 

“Me too,” Hux gasped as Kylo squeezed the base of his cock.

“But do you…” Kylo started, looking back into Hux’s eyes, and before he could continue climbed over Hux and started biting and sucking on his neck, feeling like it would be too much if he could see Hux’s face just then.

“Do what?” Hux panted, “Fuck other people you mean?” he finished Kylo’s question for him and dug his fingernails into Kylo’s back. Ren nibbled on his ear in confirmation. “No. Too busy,” Hux answered himself, his breathing getting more shallow. 

“Okay,” Kylo hummed against his neck and started mouthing down Hux’s bare chest, creating fresh bruises in places where the old ones faded. Hux shivered under his touch and Kylo slid his fingers down Hux’s sides, feeling him breathe and squirm. 

“Fucking hell, Ren. Just get on with it,” Hux growled through gritted teeth.

Kylo sat up and grinned down at Hux, drinking in the sight in front of him. Hux, hot and ready for him, desperate for more, brows furrowed in irritation mixed with desperation. It was something he’d never get bored of. He finally reached to grab the lube and squirted a generous amount onto his fingers.

“I hate that sound.” Hux frowned underneath him.

“What?” Kylo flicked his gaze from his hands at Hux.

“The sound lube makes when it’s coming out of a bottle. Gross,” Hux murmured and glared at the bottle in Kylo’s hand.

Kylo raised his eyebrows and started laughing so hard he almost dropped the bottle, his eyes were closed and laugh lines formed in their corners. Hux could feel the mattress underneath him shake with it. “You’re so weird.” Kylo shook his head, trying to compose himself back. He smiled almost fondly and closed the cap on the bottle, throwing it to the side. He knew that it would probably be easier if Hux turned around and was on his hands and knees but he couldn’t help but selfishly want to see Hux’s expressions as he fingered him. He ran his index finger from Hux’s balls down his crack, stopping at his entrance and pressing it lightly with his slick finger, not entering. Hux’s moved his hand to grab his cock, but Kylo took a hold of it with his free hand and pinned it down to the covers next to him. 

“I don’t think so,” he hummed and shook his head. Hux was scowling at him but didn’t say anything. Kylo grinned and finally pushed one finger inside of Hux. “Good boy,” he said and Hux bit his bottom lip, breathing hard. Kylo loved seeing him like this so much. He was so helpless and willing and completely at his mercy. Hux was so tight and hot around his finger he had a hard time believing he could actually fit his dick inside of his ass, but Hux never failed to surprise him. He moved it in and out slowly, feeling Hux relax around his finger, curled it in the way he himself liked, and without a doubt it made Hux let out a choked moan. Kylo added a second finger and repeated the motion, making Hux grip at the sheets with one hand where Kylo put it and the other reaching behind his head. Kylo couldn’t pick what he wanted to watch more: Hux’s face which was making the most amazing expressions, mouth slack and eyes open wide looking at the ceiling; Hux’s cock which looked so hard it had to be unbearable, or his own fingers slowly disappearing inside Hux’s ass and stretching him open. Kylo’s own dick was throbbing expectantly and he felt like he was going to burst just from the sight of Hux like that, so he stroked himself with his free hand before reaching to grab the back of Hux’s right knee with it and pulled it up to spread Hux open even more. 

Hux stopped staring at the ceiling and lifted his head up to watch Kylo who looked back at him, and without a word added a third finger and pushed them steadily inside Hux. Kylo continued working them inside Hux’s asshole, going slowly, moving his eyes between Hux’s face and his hand.

“Get on with it,” Hux hissed and flung his head against the mattress. Kylo smirked threateningly at him.

“Don’t get bossy with me,” Kylo warned Hux before suddenly ramming all three of his slick fingers inside knuckle deep, making Hux swallow down a loud moan and roll his eyes up. Hux rolled his hips pushing into him and breathed shallowly.

“What do you want from me?” Kylo asked as he curled his fingers up again, hitting his prostate with precision. He never was a dirty talker before but with Hux, it was irresistible to see him get uncomfortable as he let filth freely float out of his mouth.

“I’m…,” Hux started but it got stuck in his throat and came out as a moan when Kylo hit his sweet spot again, “I’m not begging you for shit,” he spat out finally and glared Kylo who just chuckled. It took everything in Kylo not to groan at the image in front of him. Hux started to reach for his cock again but Kylo grabbed his hand once more, this time holding onto it and received the dirtiest of looks from Hux. Kylo took out his lubed up fingers, making Hux whimper at the loss and seized Hux other hand with them. He moved both of Hux’s hands above his head and pinned Hux underneath him, staring into his eyes.

“What do you want from me?” he spat out, repeating himself. Hux’s lips were forming a thin line of fury and it took a couple of seconds for him to respond.

“I’m going to ride your dick,” snarled Hux. Kylo was not expecting a response like this and in the short moment of surprise Hux managed to flip Kylo to the side and straddle his stomach. Well, Kylo kind of let him do it. Hux knew that if Kylo didn’t want Hux to move him, he wouldn’t be able to even lift his finger because compared to Hux, Ren was built like a fucking brick. 

Hux took the abandoned bottle of lube and reached behind his back to prepare Kylo’s rock hard cock. When he was done, he threw the bottle away and ran his hands down Kylo’s torso. Kylo’s hands were grabbing both of Hux’s thighs, he was looking up at Hux in awe mixed with predatory hunger. 

“What are you waiting for?” Kylo urged Hux who scowled at him. Hux lifted himself up and positioned the tip of Kylo’s penis between his cheeks so it was brushing his entrance. Kylo had to dig his fingernails into Hux’s skin even harder, which would ,without a doubt, leave moon crescent shaped bruises, trying to restrain himself from jerking his hips up. Hux locked their eyes, his cheeks redder from being on display, but obviously proud that he was the one in charge again, as he let the head of Kylo’s dick enter him. Kylo shut his eyes and tilted his head back slightly. Hux panted quietly and excruciatingly slowly lowered himself down until he was sitting down on Kylo’s lap with his cock fully buried inside of Hux. The sensation was almost too much. Hux felt incredibly hot and tight around him, squeezing him so right he could probably come undone just like this. Hux experimentally moved his pelvis forward and then back and,  _ oh god,  _ Kylo was convinced he’d never feel this good again. Hux snickered and then purposefully tightened around Kylo who let out a loud groan.

“Look at you. A mess beneath me.” Hux hummed and started fucking himself on Kylo’s dick, trying to stifle the sounds he was making each time he his own prostate. His ginger eyebrows, above which his forehead glistened with sweat, were pinched together, mouth faintly ajar and red as he rolled his hips in the most filthy way imaginable, and Kylo couldn’t get enough. 

Kylo couldn’t handle Hux’s leisure tempo and without a second thought sat up, embraced his hands around Hux’s back so that Hux’s knees were hooked around Kylo’s shoulders and switched them around, moving Hux onto his back again. He grabbed Hux’s hands and held them on each side of his own legs and started mercilessly pounding into Hux who had barely any time to recover from the surprise.

“Let’s see who’s a mess now,” huffed Kylo emphasizing each word with a thrust. If Kylo thought Hux was a pretty sight before, after that he was convinced he found God and he was ginger because Hux was making the sweetest of sounds underneath him, crying out with each thrust. His eyes with pupils so blown out the blue was barely visible were staring right into Kylo’s brown ones, piercing him. Kylo shifted the angle of his hips a little trying to hit  _ that  _ spot inside Hux and after a few tries obviously succeeded because Hux’s eyes went wide and he practically screamed.

“Ren. Fuck,” Hux moaned as Kylo rammed into him. The sound of skin slapping against skin was way too loud, mixing with the buzz of blood flowing in Kylo’s ears. “Ren. Ren. Ren.” Hux kept repeating his name like a prayer and Kylo was sure the entire hallway would remember it by tomorrow. He knew he wouldn’t last much longer and judging by the fact that Hux was whimpering and shaking he wouldn’t either. 

“Hux,” he gasped, “Holy shit, Hux I…” Hux tightened around him once more. Kylo’s orgasm hit him like a fucking train at full speed, making him give out a few last shuddering shoves, his vision blurring while he came. His cock throbbed inside of Hux, and Kylo’s chest rose up and down as he breathed heavily. Before he could pull out, Hux’s orgasm followed his own and he came, trembling and crying out, all over his stomach without touching himself since his wrists were still in Kylo’s hold. Kylo watched Hux writhe underneath him and sighed. He started to pull out and Hux winced at the loss, squeezing his eyes shut. 

When Kylo let go of Hux’s arms, he noticed he was gripping them so hard there were bruises forming in the shape of his fingers already. He reached over Hux who covered his face with his palms, trying to calm his breathing and was still shaking slightly, to grab tissues from his desk. He wiped himself off, his muscles feeling limp from the sheer strength of his orgasm, and was about to do the same to Hux, but then opted for something else. Kylo leaned down and licked the drops of come off Hux’s bare chest making a soft “Ah,” escape Hux’s mouth in return as Hux slid one hand into his hair, which sent pleasant tingling down Kylo’s spine. He mouthed up his collarbone and finished with a gentle bite at the crook of Hux’s neck before rolling off Hux and laying down next to him. When Hux seemingly came back to his senses, he took the messed up duvet from underneath them and covered both of them with it.

“Get out of my bed, Ren.” Hux glared at the ceiling, avoiding Kylo’s eye contact. 

“But it’s comfortable here,” Kylo whined and rolled to the side, burying his face into the sheets. 

“Oh my god, you’re  _ not  _ sleeping here!” Hux poked his side but it wasn’t very energetic.

“Shh. Too late,” Kylo said and hummed. Hux sighed and pointedly turned away from Kylo.

They laid like that next to each other in silence for a while before Hux sat up and turned off the desk lamp that was still illuminating their room, when he gave up on hoping Kylo would leave his bed. He returned to his position, but despite feeling pleasantly tired for the first time in a long while, he couldn’t hold back and interrupt the heavy silence. “You can…,” Hux started, speaking in a quiet voice that sounded less antagonistic than usual, “I mean, you can fuck other people you know? This isn’t a  _ thing _ . We’re not exclusive.”

Kylo didn’t respond for a while. “I don’t really wanna. Do you want to fuck other people?” he eventually said, the vibrations of his deep voice practically flowing through Hux because his bed wasn’t suited for two people and they were  _ so  _ close, but still not touching somehow, even though Kylo alone could probably barely fit onto the mattress.

“Not really. Too busy with school.” Hux replied and yawned.

“Okay,” Kylo whispered and before exhaustion won over him, studied the curve of Hux’s neck from behind and breathed in the smell of him in the dark, trying to memorise it.

***

When Kylo woke up the next morning, at first it was because he felt a cold air on his chest, and someone moving his hand. Apparently, he took a hold of Hux’s torso in their sleep and the discomfort began when Hux tried to gently move his arm away from his chest so that he could leave the bed. Kylo, still half asleep, wanted to tighten his grip on Hux and not let him go but he decided it would be less awkward if he pretended to be asleep and let Hux leave. He frowned when the warmth of Hux’s body next to him left and buried himself further into the soft duvet. The sound of shuffling and quiet thumping of Hux’s steps send him to light sleep. He heard the noises silence at the back of his mind for a second, and suddenly felt a hand in his hair for the briefest of moments, but before he could even fully wake up the door closed and Hux was out of their room. 

Kylo blinked groggily, trying to adjust his brain to the fact that he woke up on a different side of the room. He rubbed his neck, which was cramping from a night of sleep without a pillow, and was about to do the same to his eyes, when he felt something stuck to his cheek. Puzzled, Kylo felt it with his fingers. It was a post-it note. Of course it was. He peeled it off his skin and lifted it in front of his face. Hux’s sleek cursive on the orange paper said, “Make my bed, asshole.” Classy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think this is my favourite chapter so far but I always want to hear what y'all think c: don't hesitate to leave a comment if you like reading this little escapade of mine :D


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. i am SO SO SO SORRY for not uploading since summer. i started uni in september and life is just a mess. i've been doing very very bad mental health wise and creating or writing anything feels almost impossible when all you want to do is die or kill.  
> 2\. i am slowly getting on track again thanks to my amazing friends and hopefully, i'll be able to upload regularly every week or so again.  
> 3\. huge thanks to everyone patient enough to read this :') leave me a comment if you've actually managed to stick with my terrible uploading habits if you want to <3

It appeared that ever since university began, Hux was just living under different levels of stress but never really stress-free. As the weather got colder and the nights got longer his schedule also got tighter. Hux refused to receive results that were anything else than the top of his classes in everything he attended, and no matter how consistent he’s been with his work he knew he should still work as hard as he could and study for the exams at any chance he got.

The end of the calendar year was only two months away, and so he and Phasma had to work more hours than before due to paperwork that needed to be finished doubling. He hated that place and how unstimulating it was. He hated how it didn’t give him any real prospect of climbing up the corporate ladder or motivation. The only real asset it provided was that Hux got really fucking good at paperwork. He planned on quitting so he could focus on exams soon but he also secretly didn’t want to leave Phasma behind.

Hux sighed and rubbed his eyes. History revision. Right. He had no idea how many hours have passed since he started, but his shoulder blades and neck were telling him it’s been way too many. The sensible thing would be to go for a walk, or something to clear his head, but since Hux wasn’t very in tune with his physical needs, he decided against it and moved to another revision topic on his list.

***

Hux refused to admit that he fell asleep at his desk and opted to say he “spaced out”. Anyway, at one point he was rudely interrupted by Ren opening their door whilst “spacing out” and rubbed his eyes, attempting to regain his composure and focus. He rested his forehead against his palm and sighed. He still had three topics to go through before he went to sleep, if he didn’t wanna fall behind on his revision plan and had no idea how he’d do that. Hux was deep in thoughts, slightly stressing out and too preoccupied to even notice Ren shuffling around their room, or give him any attention whatsoever. His ears were buzzing and his fingers trembling. He’s been feeling _so_ tired lately and his brain has been threatening to snap like a rubberband under all of the pressure.

Suddenly, he heard a paper cup land next to his hand on his desk and before he had time to process what was happening, Ren’s heavy hand landed on top of his head and surprisingly gently ran through his hair. Hux shivered slightly and had to stop himself from leaning into the touch and closing his eyes. His brain was malfunctioning. He was sure of it. There was no rational way to explain why else would _that_ be his first instinct instead of looking up at Ren and yelling at him.

Hux shook his head in an attempt to clear it up but not even a second later the door was closing behind Ren who was running away. The coward. He glanced at the cup and hesitantly reached out for it. Knowing Ren, its contents could have been poisoned. Or worse. It could have been coffee with whole milk. He could feel its contents were still hot which means Ren must’ve deliberately bought it on the way to the dorms. What the fuck? Why would he do that?

Hux removed the plastic lid, revealing milk foam sunken underneath a generous drizzle of caramel. Holy shit. He took a sip and sure enough, Ren got him a caramel macchiato with soy milk. How the everloving fuck did he know it was Hux’s favourite overpriced caffeinated beverage? He shrugged and took another sip. God, it was so good he could feel his brain immediately waking up. Who cares that it was beyond disturbing that Ren actually did something _nice_ for him? Definitely not Hux.

***

Throughout the week, they yelled at each other way less than before. The clothes scattered around Ren’s bed along with a dirty mug on his desk would drive Hux insane before and he would make Ren aware of the fact but he just couldn’t be bothered going through the pointless arguing. He would do anything to see Ren riled up just a few weeks ago. See him ball his fists in anger and the way his giant nose would scrunch a bit when he wanted to put Hux down but couldn’t think of a comeback quickly enough.

In fact, Hux couldn’t be bothered to do anything these days besides routinely going to lectures, library, and work. He was so damn tired and even when he was finally done with working and tried to let the exhaustion take over his eyelids he couldn’t fall asleep. He would toss and turn until the anxious heartbeat in his chest was too loud and resigned he'd grab his phone and spent the night reading.

The last time he recalls being able to sleep through the whole night was when Ren slept next to him. He hated himself for admitting it, but that was a rare nightmare-free night for him and the fact that Ren had anything to do with it made him want to punch walls. He wasn’t some touchy-feely girl that needed a strong man to hold him through the night and so he steered clear of Ren, desperate to avoid his intense gaze, his dumb hair and angry moods which would lead to sex that could end up with them sleeping in the same bed.

And when one afternoon, despite knowing he looked like his own body was begging him to take a break, when Ren mumbled, “You look like you’re carrying the entire world on your shoulders,” when he saw him after the whole day, Hux almost lost it.

“Mind your own business,” he started. He could feel the anger rise in his chest and the corners of his vision going red with it. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. There was no way he was going to yell at Ren. He knew it would end in shoving and angry fucking. Not that he didn’t enjoy that. He did, and very much so. Maybe too much.

“You live with me so you _are_ my business. You look like you haven’t slept in a week and all you do is study. Watch a movie and take a nap before you faint,” huffed Ren, suddenly not meeting Hux’s eyes in the usual deep stare but glancing around the room.

“Unlike you, I actually want to get good grades,” Hux spat back. The antagonism was slowly coming back and without even noticing he was standing up, his fist balled and shaking. Oh, how the tables have turned.

“You’re not gonna get those if you have a heart attack at the age of 19,” Ren growled and finally looked Hux in the eye. He was trying so hard to not get angry at Hux it was slightly comical.

Hux laughed bitterly and took a step closer to Ren, not listening to his usually overbearing rational thoughts. “I let you fuck me once and suddenly you want to act like you give a crap about me? Fuck you, Ren!” he yelled. He couldn’t stop his fist from swinging in full force. In the space of one second, Ren dodged his hand and it collided strongly with the wall behind him with a loud bang. Hux was breathing hard, his hand now limp against his side eyes fixed on Ren’s face, seeking reaction. All he found was warm brown eyes filled with something. Understanding, perhaps? _God, I hate him._

Hux’s eyes flickered behind Ren’s head and he saw a dent in the wall. It wasn’t that he was that strong, but because the walls weren’t built from a particularly quality material. His chest was still rising up and down rapidly but the violent rage he felt at his very core just a minute ago seemed to be slowly dripping away from him, replaced by a pleasant numbness.

Ren frowned and hesitantly reached for Hux’s hand. Hux glared at him. _What the fuck is he doing?_ Ren’s warm fingers wrapped around his palm and he lifted both of their hands up. His touch was soft and so unlike Ren, lacking the usual feverish need and passion. Hux looked at them to find two of his knuckles were bleeding. He didn’t even notice the throbbing pain until Ren’s thumb ran over them. Ren sighed, dropped their hands and without a word grabbed his towel from his chair and left the room. Hux just looked after him and silently sat on his own bed, leaning against the wall. He felt nothing. Mind-numbing nothing. His own breathing was like a loud rumbling in his head. He reached over to grab his phone and pressed play on their playlist hoping to drown out the deafening emptiness of his brain with the angsty songs Ren filled it with. It was as if with the hole in the wall he shut off his emotions completely.

Hux lifted his hand in front of his face flexing his fingers, examining how the wounds stretched and bled a bit more. When Ren entered the room again, Hux only glanced at him briefly as an acknowledgement of his presence. He sat down next to Hux and took his hand once again. Hux could feel Ren’s bodily warmth on his side. He closed his eyes and let the back of his head hit the wall behind him with a soft thump. Out of nowhere, Ren was pressing a warm wet towel against his knuckles, dabbing at the open wounds in an attempt of cleaning up the bloody mess. It stung pleasantly and Hux smiled, grateful to feel anything. He was just so damn tired and Ren was so… Ren was just _there_.

“You know, it’s funny,” Hux started, his voice monotone, “I thought it would be you out of the two of us who would first end up punching a hole in the wall.” He opened his eyes ever so slightly and turned his head lazily to face Ren who was focused on his knuckles.

“You need to chill,” Ren mumbled, not meeting his eyes. _Maybe that’s for the better._

“Stop telling me what to do,” Hux retorted flatly, “And you telling _me_ to chill is awfully hypocritical of you.”

“Then at least sleep,” Ren continued, not giving up on lecturing Hux.

Hux snorted at that and turned away from Ren in order to study the way Ren’s hand looked wrapped around his. “I would love to if I could,” he said quietly, the word _love_ oozing with the remains of his mother’s British accent. The confession felt so strange, out there in the open. Hux wasn’t used to letting anyone know he was anything but perfectly fine. Suddenly he would prefer if Ren made fun of him instead of doing whatever the fuck he was doing now. Gently holding his hand, trying to clean the blood that was no longer there and telling him to take care of himself in hushed tones.

The stupid playlist was still playing in the background, overwhelmingly loud in the silence of their discomfort. And of course, it had to be one of the songs Hux put on there in a pitiful moment of weakness. _The fabric of your flesh, pure as a wedding dress, until I wrap myself inside your arms I cannot rest._ The fucking irony of the situation was not lost to Hux. He almost started laughing if it wouldn’t make Ren think he was completely insane. _The saints can't help me now, the ropes have been unbound. I hunt for you with bloodied feet across the hallowed ground._ Hux looked back at Ren who let go of his hand finally and was now staring back at him. He was startled for a second by the proximity of their faces. He could feel Ren’s breath on his cheek.

“Let’s watch _Big Hero 6_ ,” Ren suggested before Hux had the chance to actually do something embarrassing like _kiss_ Ren, God forbid.

“You’re serious?” Hux raised his eyebrows and laughed mockingly.

“Why not? It’s a good movie and I am not letting you go back to studying,” Ren argued defensively, already sliding off Hux’s bed to get his laptop, “Not until you don’t look like a corpse that will punch more walls.”

Any other day Hux would have happily spat into Ren’s face and told him to fuck off for thinking he was ‘letting’ him do anything but he was just so fucking exhausted. There was no point in fighting Ren. “Wouldn’t have pegged you for the Disney type. I’d think you’d be more into deep cinematography shit being an artsy emo and all that.”

“The animation is great.” Ren shrugged and sat in his place, next to Hux.

“Whatever,” mused Hux. He felt like speaking was too much work and just let Ren do his thing as he kept his head tilted backwards. He shut his eyes tightly and opened them, blinking the light away from the corners of his vision afterwards. It didn’t help.

About halfway through the movie, Hux started to become painfully aware of how close to touching their hands were. They left them resting between their thighs and if Hux moved his only two inches to the left he would be touching Ren. _What the fuck?_ Sleep deprivation was playing with his mind because there is no way stable Hux would ever think about shit like that.

After the end credits started rolling, Hux stood up without a word, grabbed his towel and headed out to take a shower. Upon returning to their room, he found Ren still on his bed typing something on his laptop. _Probably his angsty poems._ They haven’t fucked since last week, if you don’t count a handjob or two, and Hux would be lying if he said he didn’t miss it. Maybe letting Ren fuck him so hard he’ll have bruises the next day will make the numb tiredness go away.

Hux approached Ren’s hunched figure. Ren looked up from his screen and silently locked his eyes with Hux, not breaking the eye contact as Hux climbed on the bed. Hux could see Ren’s eyes darken as he slowly, leaned in and grabbed Ren’s t-shirt. He connected their mouths hungrily already feeling his rising arousal. Ren gasped and without hesitation took Hux’s face in his hands, pulling him closer.

“Fuck me,” Hux whispered breathlessly between their kisses that weren’t really kisses but rather attempts at devouring each other whole. He reached between them gripping Ren’s already hard cock through his sweatpants making him choke out a groan.

“Fuck,” Ren whined and made his way from Hux’s mouth onto his neck where he bit down hard. Hux pulled at Ren’s hair and let out a breathy laugh, loving the pain Ren’s teeth were causing him and tilted his head to give Ren more room. Ren moved further down biting and sucking on his neck and one of his hands slid down from Hux’s back to clutch at his ass, turning Hux’s laugh into a moan.

Ren must have understood what Hux needed from him because in no time he had him on all fours, with three fingers shoved down his ass, panting. “You like that? You like getting fucked until you can’t feel anything?” Ren asked huskily as he moved his fingers in and out of Hux with a wet sound.

“Shut up,” Hux hissed and gripped his sheet as Ren glazed over his prostate.

“Answer me,” Ren demanded.

Why did he insist on talking so much? Can’t he just fuck Hux without psychoanalyzing him, the fucker? Hux was about to turn around and glare at him but before he could do so Ren moved his fingers inside of him and reached around his middle, his hand planted on Hux’s abdomen. He shivered unwillingly and felt his breath catch at the back of his throat as Ren’s hand spread heat around his stomach and agonizingly slowly moved down towards his throbbing dick.

“Come on, tell me how much you like my fingers in your ass,” Ren said in a hushed voice and scissored his fingers, spreading Hux open even more.

Hux’s mind felt like it was about to explode with sensations with Ren’s hand on his hip, positioned just right enough so he was almost touching his cock. His body shook again and he let go with his hands, dropping on the bed with one side of his face pressed against the sheets thrusting ever-so-slightly back into Ren’s hand. He let out a soft moan and closed his eyes with pleasure mixed with embarrassment as he stumbled on his own words, “I fucking, ah, I love it.” He barely believed what was coming out his mouth. He had no idea who he was anymore.

But Ren wasn’t humiliating him like Hux thought he would. Instead, he exited Hux and wrapped his arms around his shoulders, hoisting him upwards so that Hux’s back was flushed against his front. Hux could feel Ren’s hard length hot and heavy against his backside. Ren’s hold wasn’t tight or forceful, but it felt more damning than any bitemark he’s ever left on Hux’s skin. Perhaps they were doomed the first time they kissed. He buried his face in the crook of Hux’s neck and inhaled his scent before sucking tenderly on his skin there. And Hux, cursing himself internally for being a fool, closed his eyes and let him, only sighing in return.

Ren moved his left hand down to Hux’s groin, giving him a few strokes before slowly aligning himself with Hux’s hole.

“Just fuck me already,” Hux choked out impatiently. He wasn’t going to last too long anyway with how much time Ren was taking. When he felt Ren’s cock enter him slowly he winced at the stretch. Ren roamed Hux’s chest and stomach with his hand in response before finally fully entering him. Hux grunted with satisfaction, feeling full and hot and just _good_.

Ren started with slow thrusts. After making sure Hux was adjusted, he angled himself slightly differently and drove in with more force. Hux tried swallowing down the moan his mouth made in response. Ren took a hold of his side and turned his head slightly, his lips grazing against Hux’s ear. His thrusts became quicker, more deliberate and Hux had to touch himself if he didn’t wanna come right then. His free hand reached behind his head, grabbing at Ren’s hair blindly, pulling him in.

Still, Hux was trying to muffle the noises he was making, biting his lips with each strike of Ren’s hips. From the moment his fist connected with the plaster hours ago, the mood between them shifted. Hux had to remind himself to tread lightly because _this_ no longer felt like a war zone but somehow he felt more endangered than ever before.

“Scream for me,” Ren breathed desperately into Hux’s ear, “I know you want to,” he urged him. Hux’s traitorous body quivered and he gave out a sob in response.

“Fuck Hux. You’re so fucking tight,” hummed Ren as Hux pulled on his hair more. He bit down on Hux’s already bruised and sweaty neck. “So good.” He placed his right hand on Hux’s chest pulling him so close Hux felt as if they would melt into each other.

Hux’s heart was beating incredibly fast in his ribcage and he was sure Ren’s felt each beat on his fingers. Ren’s palm was so hot and secure and just maybe if they kept this up his heart would jump from under his skin sight into it. Ren was hitting Hux’s prostate with each shove and his left hand replaced Hux’s on his dick. Hux leaned his head back, resting it on Ren’s shoulder. His eyes rolled back in his head from the staggering bliss, letting out cries he could no longer hold back.

“I’m so fucking close,” Ren grunted and just those words along with Ren’s tightened grip on his cock drove Hux over the edge. He finished with a scream, his vision blurred as his back arched.

Ren followed not long after. He slid out of Hux, splatters of his come landing on his lower back as his hips jerked erratically from the strength of his orgasm.

They fell down on the dirty sheets after, slick with sweat, their bodies satisfyingly limp. Hux’s mind was empty but this time it was a good kind of fucked out empty when he was too tired to think or feel anything. All he knew was Ren next to him and their loud breathing.

 _What was that?_ He looked over at Ren with a frown when he felt the mattress shift but instead of seeing him leave the bed he just grabbed the covers and pulled them over them both. The bed’s size didn’t allow for a lot of space so before he registered what was going on, Ren was on his side, his gaze roaming all over Hux’s face. He was so close and the bed was so warm with him next to Hux.

“You’re not sleeping here,” Hux complained. _Again._

“I am,” Ren stated flatly and Hux opened his mouth to argue before he continued, “Your eyes are more gray and green than blue,” he mused, “I like that.”

Hux’s then steady heartbeat gave an uncomfortable jolt and he scoffed. “Stop talking nonsense.” _What the fuck is up with Ren lately? He’s acting more dramatic than usual._ But instead of saying anything else he turned to face the wall, letting Ren know he was done talking. A few minutes later he felt Ren’s hand slide around his middle and pulling him closer. And if Hux turned around after a while, pretending to be asleep already, and let Ren hold him while he buried his face in his stupidly wide chest no one had to know.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> we're about halfway through the storyline i have planned so buckle up. i know i keep promising feelings soon and they are happening i swear i just want to build up to it so it doesn't feel unnatural. i actually got to go to the red carpet premiere of tlj in london and saw the cast and i cried so much :'))) also i saw tlj last night and it was INCREDIBLE HOLY SHIT.


	10. update

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> hi guys,  
> i know i haven't updated this work in almost a year and i'm very sorry for that but life was very chaotic and overwhelming. for those who are still following this fic I just wanted to give an update on its status. i'm not orphaning or deleting this work but i have decided not to continue updating it. reasons for that are various but mainly because i've been accidentally exposed to the kylux fandom, that i kept away from until then, and the majority of it made me feel really uncomfortable and it's all i can think about whenever i see any kylux content now tbh. on top of that i just don't have the capacity to pressure myself into writing this, as much as i loved the idea and the plans i had for the future chapters. anyway, i might decide to continue writing this later but if i do it will be for my personal use unless i change my mind. 
> 
> thank you for every single one of you guys who read this until now and who left me comments :') <3

(please read the chapter summary for explanation)


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